Brothers and sisters, I am incredibly humbled to stand before you today. It doesn't seem like that long ago that I was a student listening to devotional. In fact, eight years ago when I had just started dating my wife, we held hands for the first time on a devotional date. So if you came here on a devo date . . . you never know. I can't say that I have a huge amount of life experience--in fact, I will probably look back at this devotional 20 years from now and realize I knew very little. That being said, I have known about this assignment for a long time, and for many months I have thought and prayed about what I might say. I feel like the Lord has placed significant spiritual experiences in my life, and I feel strongly that I am supposed to share some of them with you. I pray that the Spirit will be here to teach us today. I feel that the most essential thing that I can talk about is striving to seek the will of the Lord in all things.
One of the most important things you can do to help you seek the will of the Lord is to surround yourself with people who have the same spiritual goals that you do. This includes roommates, friends, and people you date and ultimately marry. I owe so much of everything I am today to my wife, Bethany. She inspires me and helps me want to align myself with the Lord. It is much easier to follow God's will when you have a spouse or others around you that desire the same things you desire. Bethany wants to do only what the Lord wants; that is also my desire. As a result, we are able to help and strengthen each other in our goal of returning to our Heavenly Father as a couple that is sealed together by the priesthood.
Everything that happens in this life is an opportunity to become. The gospel of Jesus Christ is about becoming what our Heavenly Father wants us to become. It doesn't matter if we are going through difficult or easy times; we need to take every experience in our lives and seek to become more like our Father in Heaven. Elder Dallin H. Oaks has said,
Final Judgment is not just an evaluation of a sum total of good and evil acts--what we have done. It is an acknowledgment of the final effect of our acts and thoughts--what we have become. It is not enough for anyone just to go through the motions. The commandments, ordinances, and covenants of the gospel are not a list of deposits required to be made in some heavenly account. The gospel of Jesus Christ is a plan that shows us how to become what our Heavenly Father desires us to become.[1]
Elder Oaks masterfully teaches that the gospel is all about becoming. The point of this life is not to simply get through difficult situations; it is to become more like our Savior Jesus Christ in the process. Sometimes we think that if we can only get through this trial, we will be all right. Instead, we should seek to know what our Heavenly Father desires us to learn and become as a result of that experience.
Today I will discuss three main principles that help us seek the will of the Lord.
Seeking the will of the Lord:
1. Prayer
2. Atonement
3. Prior Assurance
1. Prayer
We start understanding what our Heavenly Father wants for us through prayer. Prayer is the opportunity to come to the Father and be mentored and loved.
In the Bible Dictionary, under prayer, we read,
As soon as we learn the true relationship in which we stand toward God (namely, God is our Father, and we are His children), then at once prayer becomes natural and instinctive on our part (Matt. 7:7-11). Many of the so-called difficulties about prayer arise from forgetting this relationship. Prayer is the act by which the will of the Father and the will of the child are brought into correspondence with each other. The object of prayer is not to change the will of God but to secure for ourselves and for others blessings that God is already willing to grant but that are made conditional on our asking for them.[2]
I used to home teach a couple in our ward that was not very active in the Church. But they did ask if I would give their son (we will call him Adam) a priesthood blessing to help enable him to stop smoking. Adam is a baptized member of the Church who is about 38 years old but has not been active most of his life. I gave him a priesthood blessing, and afterward I talked to him about his interaction with the gospel, and he told me that he didn't believe The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints was the only true church and that I wasn't going to convince him otherwise.
Although it was not my job to convince him, I did tell him I had prayed and asked God if this is His Church, and I had received an answer that it is true. I have felt that confirming witness many times. I also told him that God answers specific questions. Adam told me that he didn't feel like God answered his questions. He explained that he prays but does not get specific direction. He went on to say that a long time ago, he prayed about the Church but didn't feel like he received an answer. I testified of God's love and that He does answer prayers. I went on to explain that it is according to God's timing because He knows what is best for us. I told Adam that we have to be ready to accept the answer that God will give us. I also told Adam I have had many experiences when I prayed desperately for direction and answers but didn't always or even often feel an immediate answer. Adam said, "That's unfortunate, and I won't believe if I can't get my answers when I ask." I challenged him to pray about the Church again, asking a specific question; but, if he was to do so, that he needed to be ready and willing to follow the answer he was given.
I came home from that experience to find my wife, Bethany, putting our kids down to sleep. If any of you have ever tried to put kids down to bed, you know the struggle is real, especially when they don't think they are tired. We were having a tough time convincing our two-year-old, Madelyn, to go to sleep. She was obviously very tired, but she wasn't quite ready to give up the fight. As I tried to get her to sleep, Madelyn began to ask for things: first milk, then Mommy. I told her no, but that wasn't what she wanted to hear. Eventually, she got more frustrated and desperate in her pleas: she wanted Grandpa, next Grandma. The more I told her no, the more stubborn she became. Madelyn was not listening. She begged to go for a ride in the car, then she wanted a treat--one thing after another, she cried and begged.
As her father, I knew that what she needed was sleep, and that would be the best thing for her, not any of the other things she was asking for. As she got more frustrated, I stopped answering her; she was not listening and only got more upset when I spoke. I lay next to her and stroked her hair until she fell asleep. It didn't take very long. I learned a powerful lesson about prayer that night, and I took away two main points:
1. God loves us and hears us.
I love Madelyn so much. As I think about that experience, I realize that I had stroked her hair to show her love and stayed by her. I also heard everything she asked for.
2. God knows when and how to answer our prayers.
He won't answer if we won't listen. I stopped talking to Madelyn; she wasn't rational, and she wasn't listening.
I wonder how often I am like Madelyn in my prayers. God will always show love, but I have to be willing to listen and change what I want to what He wants. He only wants what is best for me.
2. Atonement
As we align our will with Heavenly Father through prayer, we are able to see the enabling power of the Atonement in our lives. To illustrate this, I made up a simple example that I have entitled "The Parable of the Dishwasher." Let's say you just bought a new dishwasher. It will clean the dirtiest pots, pans, and dishes. But if you don't read the instructions, use soap, or turn on the power, it won't work. You can load dishes in every day, and they will still be dirty. Yes, you are interacting with the dishwasher and even "using" it, but it will be nothing more than a box unless you use the soap and turn on the power to cleanse the dishes.
The power of the Savior and His Atonement can heal and cleanse you. There is nothing more freeing than being healed and cleansed. We cannot become what Heavenly Father wants us to become without constantly relying upon and utilizing the Atonement. Are we ever guilty of figuratively putting dirty dishes in the dishwasher and never turning it on? Sometimes we go through the motions and don't really get results. We may feel like we are repenting because we have gone through the steps of repentance. But repentance is a process, and while it does require steps, it is so much more than that.
In the Bible Dictionary, we read, "The Greek word of which this is the translation denotes a change of mind, [i.e., ]a fresh view about God, about oneself, and about the world. Since we are born into conditions of mortality, repentance comes to mean a turning of the heart and will to God, and a renunciation of sin to which we are naturally inclined."[3]
I love this explanation of repentance. It essentially means that we need to change. When we repent, we change the way we view the world, the way we think, and the way we act, which allows the Lord to mold us. It is not merely going through a list of steps. To truly repent, we must harness the power of the Atonement. Nothing else has the power to make a lasting change of this kind. Of course the Atonement is not just about changing the way we see something; it has a cleansing effect that can totally eradicate sin and help carry our burdens. As we strive to follow the will of our Heavenly Father, we must apply the Atonement in our lives.
3. Prior Assurance
Working to become more like our Savior each day through prayer and effective utilization of His Atonement empowers us to obtain blessings and see the hand of God in our lives--one of the blessings that may occur through a principle I will refer to as "prior assurance." I don't know when or why the Lord gives prior assurance to some and not to others. I don't have a formula that if you do these things, you are guaranteed to receive prior assurance. But I do know that if we are willing, the Lord will give us what we need to prepare for. And be ready for any experience. So we should ask in prayer and listen to what God is willing to share with us. I personally think that we experience prior assurance more often than we realize. It is important to be aware of what God is preparing us for. Sometimes He will help us feel something before it happens. The scriptures teach us about how Moses receives prior assurance from God. Moses talks with God, who tells Moses to "behold the world and the ends thereof, and all the children of men" (Moses 1:8).
God leaves and Satan enters. Moses immediately feels different when he is tempted and tried by Satan. When things get difficult for Moses, he calls upon God. As he continues to pray, Satan leaves[4] and Moses hears "a voice, saying: Blessed art thou, Moses, for I, the Almighty, have chosen thee, and thou shalt be made stronger than many waters; for they shall obey thy command as if thou wert God."[5] Because Moses called upon God and relied on the Atonement and power of Christ, he was able to overcome Satan and be aligned with our Heavenly Father.
Let's fast-forward this story. Moses has led the children of Israel out of Egypt. The Egyptians are in pursuit. The children of Israel reach the Red Sea and panic. They don't see any way out of this situation besides death, either by water or by the Egyptians.[6] Moses, on the other hand, has had prior assurance from God. As we just learned, he would be "made stronger than many waters; for they shall obey thy command as if thou wert God."[7] Armed with this knowledge, Moses is able to stand at the edge of the Red Sea and say, "Fear ye not, stand still, and see the salvation of the Lord. . . . And Moses stretched out his hand over the sea; and the Lord caused the sea to go back by a strong east wind all that night, and made the sea dry land, and the waters were divided."[8]
Moses had an assurance from the Lord that he would have power over the waters. Do you think Moses ever doubted that thought? Did he ever wonder when, or if, that blessing would be realized? We don't know exactly what his thoughts were from the time he received that assurance to actually seeing the application of the promised blessing. But I can imagine that he may have pondered and wondered about what that promise really meant.
Let's go back to the banks of the Red Sea. Moses is standing there and realizes that this is how that prior assurance will be realized. I imagine that he had a subtle spiritual impression that simply and quietly told him to part the sea. In the Doctrine and Covenants, we see the Lord speaking to Oliver Cowdery, who was desiring to translate the Book of Mormon: "Yea, behold, I will tell you in your mind and in your heart, by the Holy Ghost, which shall come upon you and which shall dwell in your heart. Now, behold, this is the spirit of revelation; behold, this is the spirit by which Moses brought the children of Israel through the Red Sea on dry ground."[9] Moses received a revelation from God that told him in his mind and in his heart. Sometimes I think we complicate what revelation really is. I believe the Lord shared this example with Oliver to make a point: that even magnificent results come from pure and simple revelation. We don't need to have an expectation that God will tell us in a more grandiose way than he talked to Moses.
The principle of prior assurance and personal revelation lead me to a story that I feel impressed to share. I want to be very clear that this is a personal story, and just because it happened this way for me and my family does not mean that you will have the same experience. Rather, I hope the principles taught can be helpful to you in your life.
When we were engaged to be married, Bethany received a father's blessing. During that blessing, she felt a spiritual impression that she would have twins someday. She shared that experience with me, and I was excited at the thought. We both worked hard to align our wills with the Lord's and make use of the Atonement so that we would be worthy to receive this promised blessing. With our first pregnancy, I would not have been surprised if they said that we were going to have twins. We did not get twins but instead a healthy, beautiful girl: Lila (who is here with us today). Later, when Bethany was pregnant again, we wondered about twins. No twins. This time we had a beautiful, healthy boy: Ezra. During this pregnancy, Bethany started having some health complications. At this point, we were very happy with the family that we had; however, my wife and I knew that we would have twins someday. I couldn't help but wonder when that would be. When we found out we were expecting again, we thought for sure this would be twins. We went to the doctor and expected him to tell us that there were two babies that would come to us. This was not the case, but we did have another beautiful daughter: Madelyn, who taught me that powerful lesson about prayer. With increasingly difficult pregnancies, we wondered when or if these twins would be able to come to our family. In our fourth pregnancy, we thought surely this must be the twins coming. We went to the doctor again, somewhat anxious about what we would find out. As it turns out, we were again blessed with a beautiful baby girl: Sophia. I want to be clear that we were not disappointed in any of our pregnancies when we found out that it was only going to be one baby at a time. We were grateful and had powerful spiritual experiences with each pregnancy that the Lord wanted us to have these children at that specific time. It was very clear, and we did not doubt those experiences. However, my wife and I pondered about the impression about having twins. We talked and prayed many times to see, hear, or understand what the Lord would teach us. Up to this point, we didn't feel anything, except that we were on the Lord's path and were doing what He wanted us to do.
In May of last year, Bethany and I attended the Rexburg Temple. We both felt a powerful feeling from God that our family was not complete, and a longing and desire to have more children. We truly felt aligned with God's will, and we were willing to do whatever He wanted us to do. As we pondered and discussed what that meant, we both felt the impression that we should pray for the twins to come. We acted in faith and prayed many times and thought often about that impression. In September of last year, Bethany was pregnant, and we went to our first doctor appointment. As we sat in the office, the ultrasound tech said the heartbeat was good and things looked very normal. After a minute or two, she gasped and said, "I have to tell you something--there are two babies in there." Bethany and I looked at each other with such a feeling of love, comfort, and peace. God had sent us twins. Bethany had a very difficult pregnancy, including being on bedrest for several months. This was a hard time for both of us, but we felt so blessed by the Lord. I won't go into all the details here, but I will say that many miracles occurred as these special spirits came into our family. On a routine doctor visit, we had to go immediately to the hospital to deliver the twins. Of all the close calls and possible problems that could have happened, they came safely.
While they did have to spend a few weeks in the hospital, they are very healthy and happy girls. Penelope is shown on the left and Clementine on the right.
I don't mean to say that they were healthy because of something we did. That was a tender mercy. Of course it was completely out of our hands. Through the entire pregnancy, birth, and extended hospital stay, it was evident that we were not in control at all. This was what God wanted to happen, and we have learned that if we are willing to align ourselves with His will, then all will be well. That does not mean that everything will be easy, but it will be right. It will be just the right circumstances that our Heavenly Father will allow us to have so we can learn how to become like Him.
As you can tell from this photo, Bethany and I have a large family. We had six kids in six years. Having a large and young family has its challenges, to say the least, but Bethany and I have the children we do today because we followed what the Lord wanted us to do. And because we have done that, we are so very happy with the incredible blessings that we have been given.
I love this quote because it explains how I feel: "As the heavens are higher than the earth, God's work in your life is bigger than the story you'd like that life to tell. His life is bigger than your plans, goals, or fears. To save your life, you'll have to lay down your stories and, minute by minute, day by day, give your life back to him."[10]
Brothers and sisters, we should always strive to seek the will of the Lord in everything we do by, first, communicating more effectively with our Father in Heaven; second, utilizing the Atonement daily in our lives; and third, paying attention to promptings that God may give us that will prepare us for difficult experiences that have not yet occurred.
I close with my testimony, that I know that our Heavenly Father knows us and loves us. He sent his Son, Jesus Christ, to perform the Atonement so we can be clean through Him. I know Jesus Christ is our Savior and Redeemer. I know He has restored His Church on the earth today, including the blessings of temples. The temple is the only place where we can make covenants through the priesthood that can enable us to be sealed to our families and live with them eternally with our Heavenly Father. I testify of these things in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
Notes
[1] Dallin H. Oaks, "The Challenge to Become," Ensign, October 2000
[2] "Prayer," LDS Bible Dictionary, 752-753
[3] "Repentance," LDS Bible Dictionary, 760
[4] Moses 1:9-22
[5] Moses 1:25
[6] Exodus 14: 1-12
[7] Moses 1:25
[8] Exodus 14: 13,21
[9] Doctrine and Covenants 8:2-3
[10] Adam S. Miller, Letters to a Young Mormon (2014), 17-18