Welcome to our page, we're excited you're here! You are likely here because of concerns you have with living with roommates while attending school—we don’t blame you—don’t worry, we’ve got some ideas for you to make your experience in your apartment awesome despite all the challenges that come with living with others.

Building Relationships

Whether you are a freshman in college or a seasoned upperclassman, developing and maintaining roommate relationships can be a challenge. Everyone has their own expectations of roommates and it is not uncommon to feel a mix of emotions as you try to build positive connections in your apartment. We encourage you to befriend your roommates and have three steps to help you do so.

Step 1 Practice Principles of Friendship

Watch this video and consider the following: What actions do you see that build and strengthen relationships between these roommates? What can you do today in your apartment that would build a friendship?

Step 2 Invite, Invite, Invite

Being encouraging and friendly is an easy way to be great roommate and friend. Sometimes a simple invitation sparks lasting friendships. In this video, watch and see what power an invitation holds.

Step 3 Make Roommates a Priority

You are attending BYU-Idaho to get a degree, but your roommates play a significant role in your life at college. Though you're busy, make sure to make time to be together. A few things you might do include:

  1. Roommate dinner once a week
  2. Game Night
  3. Attend activities on campus
  4. Go to church together
  5. Pray and study Come Follow Me together. Being together is a simple way to strengthen roommate relationships

Secrets to a Happy Home

Don’t we all want to move in and feel like we’re home? This feeling of belonging doesn’t happen overnight - don’t stress, you can do it! Remember, you cannot control how others feel, act, or think, but you can still be a positive influence by focusing on your own efforts. Here are some key things you should do and key things you should not do to make your apartment feel like home for everyone.

a nice home on the left and a broken down home on the right


- Practice kindness, patience, and humility.
- When others make a mistake, be quick to forgive.
- Be your best.
- When you are wrong, acknowledge it. Do your part to make things right.
- Take responsibility for your actions.
- Treat everyone the way you want to be treated.


- Be a bully, both aggressive or passive-aggressive.
- Lie or deceive others for personal gain.
- Be fake.
- Make excuses or dismiss the concerns of your roommates.
- Be hypocritical.

What does this look like?

There are lots of ways to apply these two lists of Dos and Don’ts. No matter the difficulty of the situation, these principles apply every time. Watch the following videos for more ideas on how to make your apartment feel like home.

Resolving Conflict 

Additional resources icons

It can be really tough living with others and you may have differences, but these challenges can strengthen your relationship if handled correctly. Here are a few tips to get a problem resolved:

Get All the Facts

Don't overreact and be careful to not jump to conclusions.

Listen to Understand

Focus 100% on the other person as they speak. Don't think about what you want to say next.

Address Issues Early

Don’t put it off, or “just deal with it” to avoid festering negative feelings.

Be Clear

Avoid “dancing around the issue.” Clearly describe your perspective and express your feelings.

Be Kind, Respectful, and Resourceful

Genuinely express feelings of care and friendship to your roommate. If you don’t feel positively about them you can still express kindness and respect.

If you're not being received like you hoped you would, that’s OK! Although it is hard, the best thing you can do is keep showing genuine love and friendship to your roommate.

Let's Practice

Watch the following videos and try to put yourself in the shoes of each character.

  • How would you want to be treated as each character in the videos?
  • What can you do today to increase positive feelings towards your roommates?
  • Make a plan today to improve your relationship with your roommates?

Additional Resources

Apartment Council

One of the keys to a Zion-like apartment is communication. Apartment Councils are one of the best ways roommates can get together to discuss concerns and what kind of apartment they want. Here you’ll find great resources that can help you and your roommates to effectively counsel together.

Student Living Guidebook

The Student Living Guidebook provides a clear and thorough description of the purpose, principles, and desired outcomes of Student Living, defines the structure and recommended implementation of the Student Living model, and offers educational and resource materials for teaching and reinforcing the primary principles associated with gospel-centered apartment life.

Student Living Lessons

These lessons are designed to teach individuals and apartments how to apply gospel principles in student housing for themselves. These are great resources for apartments, FHE groups, and Managers alike.

Student Living Talks

Here are foundational talks given by leaders of Brigham Young University - Idaho and General Authorities from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints that teach the fundamentals of Student Living Principles.

Student Living Videos

Some of these videos represent common scenarios in the apartment, while others teach important principles to have at home.