Things are not always the way they appear to be. I learned this, in a very personal way, when I was about your age. I was 24, doing graduate work at BYU (Provo), wildly in love and engaged to be married. The young man seemed to be my absolute dream guy: Returned missionary, well educated, employed, musical, handsome, great social skills, loved my family, and committed to keeping the Lord's commandments.
ALL the attributes and abilities, on my "husband-to-be wish list", were there! He had them all...or so it seemed.
And talk about a courtship! He wrote me poems, songs, and letters of love. What a guy! A man with the same desires for marriage and family-and for life-as I had. Or so I thought.
I was teaching family history in my BYU ward at the time, and with some compelling insights about the importance of the temple which I had gained through this calling, I chose to receive my endowments a few months prior to the time I was to be married in the temple.
What a blessing temple attendance was for me! As I returned to the temple week after week, my world view started to open up, to change. And my view of myself and my fiancé followed. I can clearly see in my mind's eye the day that I walked out of the Provo temple, after having gone fasting and praying, seeking an answer to a question that had started to haunt me: "Should I marry this man?". A friend who had accompanied me to the temple that day asked, "Well, did you get your question answered?" I replied: "I didn't get an answer-but I know that everything is going to work out."
Freeze frame. I've learned through subsequent experiences, that the Spirit of the Lord is involved whenever I find myself saying: "Everything is going to work out".
Little did I know just HOW everything was going to work out!
It seemed that from the very minute I said those words, the Spirit whispered to my fiancé, who was working in another state: "Show her what you're really like."
As the days and weeks unfolded, his behavior changed. His letters changed. Our conversations changed. My experience with our relationship changed. And, as I studied it out in my mind, I became increasingly concerned.
Enter: a servant of the Lord, my Bishop.
In preparation for April general conference, which was just two weeks away, my Bishop taught me a truth I had never known before. Although I hadn't spoken to him about my engagement or my concerns, when my Bishop offered this truth over the pulpit, he was speaking to me. He didn't use my name-but I knew-he was talking directly to me. He even let others listen in. But clearly, he was speaking to me.
Here's the truth my Bishop spoke: "If you have a question that you need answered, if you will prayerfully and humbly listen to general conference, you will get it answered every time. Perhaps at the time, perhaps over time, but you WILL get your question answered every time!"
Did I have a question?!! Absolutely. And I was desperate for an answer from the Lord.
I prepared myself for that general conference by fasting and praying-and by purchasing blank audiotapes. Now, I realize that audiotapes are not typically requisite for listening to general conference, however this was in the days that not all conference sessions were broadcast to Canada, and I wanted to audiotape the sessions for my Mom and Dad.
I can still picture the Saturday of that April general conference. I listened eagerly to every talk. I listened with my ears, mind and heart poised and ready to hear the answer to my question: "Should I marry this man?"
I experienced this day of general conference unlike any other. It was a highly unusual day of talks, because each and every talk was on marriage! Every single talk! Multiple speakers-but only one topic: marriage-or so it seemed. And the most amazing thing to me was that at the end of all those Saturday addresses on marriage, the clear answer I received was, "Don't marry this man."
I can still picture, at the conclusion of conference, turning off the TV, shutting off the cassette recorder, and walking directly and calmly to the telephone, and dialing my fiancé's number to cancel our engagement.
I wasn't nervous at all. I was at peace. I had asked. And I had received my answer. So, what's a young woman to do when she has asked, and then heard and felt the voice of the Lord telling her what to do? What's a young woman to do...but to follow through?
Fast forward several years. My ex-fiancé is married and he appears to be happily involved in family life. I have completed my Masters degree, have worked a couple of years, moved to a new city, dated some great men, and continued to be directed by the Lord to pursue further education.
Another fast forward a couple of years: It is Christmas time and among the cards and letters is something from my ex-fiancé. It is a lengthy, hand-written letter from this now- no-longer-young man, declaring that he is choosing a life-style inconsistent with Gospel teachings and Church standards, and telling me of the sorrow that has come to his wife and family since their recent divorce and his declaration.
My dear young brothers and sisters, things are not always the way they appear to be!
Years ago on that Saturday evening when I ended my engagement, it seemed to many people-many who chided me for the breakup, many who tried to convince me to change my mind-that I was terminating a relationship with a marvelous young man-a man with whom I could experience much love and joy, as we entered into the covenant of marriage, and commenced raising up a family to the Lord.
How unkind could I be?! How cruel! How unwise to turn away from this great man and his love-especially at my age (I was 24 after all!!) To many people, it seemed like I was throwing away an opportunity of a life-time.. But-things are not always the way they appear to be.
The Lord knew this young man's heart, mind and actions. And when I asked-with as much preparation and faith as I could muster-and as I listened to the messages of general conference-I was guided (some days it still feels more like "snatched") away from something that looked good-but wasn't.
One last fast forward: It is now 6 months following receiving that Christmas letter of declaration. I am asked to prepare a Relief Society lesson on marriage. Of course I will-and I know just the audiotapes to review to find an excerpt from a general conference address on marriage, to supplement my lesson.
I remember finding the clearly marked tapes, and with anticipation, pushing the "play" button on the tape player. And then, I remember listening and listening for hours, as the talks played on and on.
But something was different about the talks this time. Something was missing. To my dismay, there was nothing-absolutely nothing....about marriage! Not one talk-was on marriage!
It had been the Spirit of the Lord that had taught me as I listened to general conference. The Spirit had helped me to hear exactly what I needed to hear.
General conference had been the vehicle. The Spirit had been the messenger. "Don't marry this man" had been the message from the Lord. And for that, I will be eternally grateful.
Things are not always the way they appear to be. People are not always who they appear to be.
Cases of mistaken identity abound:
Clothed in Laban's robes, Nephi looked like Laban[1] -even to Laban's servant, who consequently heard everything that Nephi said, as just more evidence that he was talking to Laban. For eg., when Nephi spoke about taking "the engravings which were upon the plates of brass to (his) elder brethren who were without the walls",[2] Zoram assumed Nephi was talking about the elder brethren of the church, and happily went along.
Nephi also looked like Laban to Nephi's own brothers, and they were frightened and started to flee when they saw Laban-or-who they thought was Laban-coming toward them.
People are not always who they appear to be. As I was driving down the street one day, I suddenly saw one of my friend's driving in the car next to me. It was Susan. I was so happy to see her. She looked great. Then I realized, it couldn't be Susan, because-I was on my way to her funeral!
People are not always who they appear to be:
Many of those who looked like they were friends of the Prophet Joseph Smith, turned out to be his enemies!
Cases of mistaken identity abound:
In Helaman chapter 9, we read about a pile-up of confusion-almost a comedy of errors-around "who is really who?", when 5 people, who doubt Nephi's prophecy that the chief judge's brother has killed him-find the chief judge dead! They are "astonished exceedingly" and fall to the ground. Just then, some other people arrive. Finding the five lying on the ground, next to the chief judge's body, these people assume that the five are the real murderers, and that the Lord has struck them down, so they can't leave the scene of the crime.
This case of mistaken identity continues, as the five-who came to see IF the chief judge was dead-are now accused of being his murderers!!-AND are taken off to jail!!
Things certainly are not always the way they appear to be!
One reason why things are not always the way they appear to be is that two very different things can look like each other.
A student who is listening attentively and pondering every word that her professor is saying, can look just like the student next to her who is pondering how to start up a conversation after class with that cute guy two rows over.
Things are not always the way they appear to be:
- a woman who is actually very fearful can appear to be very cold and controlling.
- a man who is deeply hurt emotionally can appear to be very angry.
- a woman who is scowling-because she is thinking so intensively about the positive implications of what is being said-can appear to be disagreeing.
A recent TV advertisement for an allergy medicine is built around the point that two different things can look alike. A woman is shown sitting on the bleachers at a ball game. While all around her are cheering the team on, she is looking down and not participating. The caption on the screen then reads: "Disinterest? - or, high pollen? "
Things are not always the way they appear to be because two very different things can look so much alike: A man was taken to the emergency room. All his signs and symptoms looked like drug intoxication. But the curious thing was, that when a sample of the man's blood was tested, there was absolutely no evidence of any drug in his system. Nothing made sense, until the man roused enough to tell the physician that he had just returned from a hiking expedition in the Himalayas.
Things are not always the way they appear to be: The signs and symptoms that accompanied the adaptation of this man's body to a dramatically decreased elevation, following an extended time at an intensely high elevation, looked just like drug intoxication-a very different kind of high!
Two very different things can look alike. In Alma chapter 26, Ammon's brother accuses him of boasting, when actually, Ammon is glorying in the Lord. Ammon helps his brother understand the distinction between the two by saying:
"I will not boast of myself" but I will boast of my God, for in his strength I can do all things."[3]
Things are not always the way they appear to be:
One young man, away from home for the first time in his life, made friendships with people who took him to places the Spirit could not remain. He perceived the emptiness he felt when he was with his new friends in these places, to be evidence of his complete lack of social ability. He started to believe: "There must be something wrong with me. I'm a complete social misfit. I don't even like being with people." It was only years later, following other experiences with friends where the Spirit was present, that he made the connection, that what was uncomfortable to him, was not social situations, but was ANY situation where the Spirit was not present.
Another reason why things are not always the way they appear to be, is that when we look at a situation, we don't use a wide enough angle lens.
Imagine a picture that shows a young boy, looking down, and eating a very small piece of bread. This picture could be used effectively to solicit funds for assisting the poverty stricken children of the world. However, when we widen the frame, we see that this boy is sitting with family members on a church bench-and then, we realize-that what looked like a sad situation is actually, a sacramental moment!
Without a wide-angle lens, a relationship problem usually looks like the other person's fault. A husband complains that his wife nags. Conversely, his wife complains that he is never home. Neither sees how his or her own behavior unwittingly contributes to the problem. The wife's nagging actually invites her husband to withdraw more-both physically and emotionally. And his withdrawal invites her to nag him more.
Without a wide-angle lens, it is almost impossible to see our contribution to a problem-to consider how someone else might be experiencing our behavior, such that they are invited to do the very thing we wish they would not!
So, the next time you have a relationship problem, or you find yourself saying:
"Our relationship would be so much better, if only the other person wouldn't....(you fill in the blank), -ask yourself: "How do I usually respond when the other person does what I wish they wouldn't? How might my responses unwittingly be inviting the very behavior I wish would stop?"
When we don't use a wide-angle lens-a lens that lets us see how our actions, thoughts and feelings may be involved-when we only zoom in on the behavior of another-things are not always the way they appear to be.
Without a wide-angle lens, the intent behind another person's troublesome behavior, usually looks negative. For example, we think they are trying to hurt, undermine, disregard, or embarrass us. But again, things are not always the way they appear to be.
In the above example, the husband was amazed to find out that his wife's nagging (she termed it, "repetitive encouragement") was her best effort to reach out to him, to let him know just how important he was to her. And the wife was delighted to discover that her husband's withdrawal was his best effort to keep the peace. His best effort to stop the conflict that happened every time he came home.
In order to see the benevolent intent of another, we need a wide-angle lens!
Perhaps it was a wide-angle lens that allowed Pahoran to respond to Captain Moroni's false accusations that he was withholding troops and was a traitor. Instead of countering with anger, Pahoran wrote the following healing words to Captain Moroni:
"Now, in your epistle you have censored me, but it mattereth not; I am not angry, but do rejoice in the greatness of your heart."[4] Imagine! Pahoran could see Captain Moroni's great heart-even after Captain Moroni had falsely accused Pahoran of sitting upon his throne in a state of thoughtless stupor![5]
With a wide-angle-lens, we can see beyond the obvious-we can see things we otherwise could not-things not observable with only a zoom lens.
For eg. with a zoom lens, forgiveness looks like something we do for the benefit of someone who has wronged us. For some victims, forgiveness can even look like a way to discount the horrible acts perpetrated against them-almost a way of winking at what they feel has ruined their lives forever.
With a zoom lens, forgiveness looks like a way to help the perpetrator's life-period!
However, with a wide-angle lens, we see that forgiveness is actually for victims!! With a view of the far-reaching effects of true forgiveness, we see that forgiveness is actually the gift that victims can give to themselves!
One woman found that by forgiving her perpetrator, she was finally freed from agonizing questions-questions that had held her mind and heart captive for years: Questions like: "Why did he? Why didn't he? Why did I? Why didn't I?"
When she really prayed for power to forgive the person whom she felt had ruined her life, she discovered that forgiveness was her "get out of jail free" card. She was now able to free herself from the prison of pain and suffering. A prison that her un-forgiveness had built.
So, when you're really ready to do something for yourself-forgive someone! A true slogan could be: Forgiveness: It's not just for perpetrators anymore!
We also need a wide-angle lens to look beyond the obvious when is comes to apologies. With a zoom lens, an apology looks like something you offer to someone you have wronged. However, one man found that it was his apology TO someone who had wronged HIM, that was his key to freedom.
The man was President George Albert Smith. He offered what many would call a high level apology-some would even call it, "an impossible apology" -to a man who had spread false rumors about him. He was in anguish over this, and filled with such an abundance of negative feelings toward his perpetrator, that he felt unworthy to partake of the Sacrament.
George Albert Smith finally found freedom from his suffering, when he went to his perpetrator and said, "I'm here to ask forgiveness for the hateful feelings I've had toward you." The man became immediately apologetic himself, and the two became lifelong friends.[6]
When one couple used a wide-angle lens, they started to see their trial of cancer as a marital intimacy gift. The wife explained, "When my husband was diagnosed with colon cancer, we were both devastated and in anguish. However, cancer gave us permission to talk about things that we had never spoken of before. Travel to and from his treatments gave us uninterrupted time together-something we had not taken for years. Over time, cancer, this life-threatening illness, actually brought life to our relationship! Truthfully, I was a bit sad when my husband's treatments were over, because we slowly shifted back into living our parallel lives, where although we both felt love for each other, we didn't take time to express it in the very special ways we had during those intensive cancer days"
With a wide-angle lens we can see that a person who is saying, "Leave me alone!", may really be saying, "Please don't leave me alone".
We can see that a person who doesn't talk to us, and who looks like a snob, may actually be feeling insecure, and needs us to reach out to him or her.
With a wide-angle lens, we can see that those times which look like we are sacrificing our lives in the service of another, are actually times when we are growing more and more into ourselves-and into the life we were meant to live.
So, who really is sacrificing for whose life?
What would look different in your life, if you used a wider angle lens? What would you be able to see, that you can't see right now?
Remember, things are not always the way they appear to be, especially without a wide angle lens.
The science of biology offers an intriguing explanation for why things are not always the way they appear to be. By rotating the eye of a frog 180 degrees, a Chilean biologist and his colleagues at MIT discovered that an image of a worm was not transmitted by the frog's eye as originally thought, but rather, was transformed by the frog's eye. With the frog's eye rotated, when a worm was held to the left, the frog saw it as being to the right-and threw out his tongue in that direction to catch the worm. When the worm was held to the right, the frog saw it as being on the left-and threw out his tongue accordingly. The researchers concluded that it was the internal structure of the frog's eye, not the external stimulus of the worm, that determined what the frog saw. Thus, the experiment's report was titled, "What the Frog's eye tells the frog's brain".
What are your eyes telling your brain?
Have recent experiences "rotated your eyes"?-so to speak.
Painful or confusing life experiences can rotate our eyes, so that things are not always the way they appear to be.
One young woman left for college with the words of her father ringing in her ears, telling her that she was "stupid, and not worth anything." She believed that no one would ever like her-that she would never be good enough. Her father's angry voice, and other demeaning experiences, locked her eyes into a "rotated position" as it were.
What was the effect? In every encounter with roommates, professors, and boyfriends, her "rotated eyes" saw more and more evidence that her father was right.
Lucifer is the quintessential evil eye surgeon who loves to "rotate our eyes". Through his sinister surgery, he can make right look wrong, and wrong look right. He can make inconsequential things look all important-and things that matter least?-well, he can make those things look like they matter the very most!
He can make friends who are raised up to help you, look like enemies sent to constrain you-and he can make those who are part of leading you carefully away from your mission here on earth, look like long lost friends!
When your eyes are rotated by the adversary, sin looks like happiness. But the truth is: You can never sin enough to make you happy.
Let me repeat: You can NEVER sin enough to make you happy!
Can you think of a time when your eyes were "rotated" by the adversary? For example, if you have ever seen or read sexually explicit material, you have invited the adversary to begin rotating your eyes.
One young man at age 13 commenced having his eyes rotated, through the seemingly simple act of opening-what looked to him to be-just another magazine.
But things are not always the way they appear to be.
Little did this little boy know, that he was opening a Pandora's box that would turn his life-and his views of life and love-upside down!
Initially, he was repulsed by what he saw, but then, through repeated viewing, his heart and mind began to crave what his eyes saw. As he immersed himself in more and more pornography, he barely noticed the rotating of his eyes-along with the twisting of his mind, and the hardening of his heart!
He started to believe that everyone looked at love and at life the way he did. He started to believe that lust was really love, and that all love was, was lust. His goal in life became to have one intense lust-filled experience after another. But, there was never enough lust to fill.
Because, remember: You can never sin enough to make you happy!
He participated in illicit sexual experiences prior to, and following, his mission-seeing them as no big deal.. And besides- there was always repentance. A quick confession to the Bishop every now and then....and then, out the door for more and more lust-filled experiences. But once again....there was never enough.
Little did he realize just what sexual sin was doing to his views of himself, his life, his wife-to-be, and their relationship.
Never did he imagine that sexual sin was actually decreasing his ability to identify, and really know, true love and true marital intimacy.
Never did he imagine that so many of the things the world was telling him to do, in order to increase his enjoyment of sexual experiences-were actually making it almost impossible for him to ever experience true sexual intimacy!
Never did he imagine that he was being duped by the adversary-so that real sexual fulfillment would always be-just beyond his reach.
With his eyes so drastically and devilishly "rotated", he approached his wife on their honeymoon in a manner that made her feel " like a thing". He experienced his wife's refusal to participate in certain sexual activities, as proof that she didn't really love him. He was put off!
What was wrong with her? How cold and non-responsive could she be!
Rejection and loneliness became his constant companions.
And because of his severe "eye rotation":
Wrong looked right.
Right looked naive
Lust looked like love.
Love looked like control.
And pornography looked like his only fun, only friend, only refuge.
An anaesthetic to numb his intense pain and ever increasing loneliness.
With his continuing immersion in pornography-which riveted his eyes into their destructively rotated position:
- a female colleague's overtures to do something together, started to look exciting, while his wife's requests for prayers and scripture reading together-looked boring!
- An affair with his colleague looked freeing-like a dream come true!, while marriage and family life looked like a constraining, constricting nightmare!
- The smile on the face of his concubine (using the word the Lord uses), looked like a marvelous reward for finally finding his soul-mate!,
while his family's grief over sexual infidelity looked like even more evidence that they just didn't understand him.
But things are not always the way they appear to be.
Over time, pain and confusion started to re-emerge. He couldn't see, think, or feel straight. He couldn't tell what was real-and what was illusion.
The day his wife put all his belongings out on the front lawn, and left a note indicating that she was filing for divorce, was like a whack on the side of his head.
A beneficial whack, that momentarily corrected his vision-reversing the adversary's "rotation" process.
He saw his life for what it really was....a crying shame! And he cried. And he felt ashamed.
Suddenly, sexual sin looked stupid...and he realized how stupid it had made him. His past choices-that had looked like freedom-now looked like chains. His affair looked like one gigantic death trap! His wife looked loving and patient, rather than pushy and cold. Prayer now looked like the sure refuge from the storms of his raging emotions. And so he prayed. He prayed as he had never prayed before. He prayed for freedom from the lustful feelings that held him captive. And he fasted-for courage and for endurance.
His initial humiliation grew into true humility. Regret, turned into remorse, and into a sincere desire to thoroughly repent of his adultery.
In this state, the Spirit returned to his life, and started the process of permanently reversing the adversary's rotation of his eyes, so that he could see things are they really are.
But the process was not easy! One main reason for the intense difficulty in correcting this man's vision was that, although he had been immersed in the waters of baptism when he was eight, his experience with the Gospel since that time, consisted only of a little sprinkling: a little sprinkling of a quick prayer from time to time, a little sprinkling of a few scriptures here and there. Church attendance-but never a time of worshiping and seeking after God. Fasting, only because his parents demanded it.
This intermittent sprinkling of Gospel truths in his life, gave this man only enough experience with the Gospel to feel guilty, but not enough experience to feel joy-the kind of joy that comes through immersion in the Gospel-regular immersion, for example, in prayer, scripture study, temple worship, and fasting.
Are you sprinkling your life with the Gospel-or are you immersing yourself in it?
Tragically, the only thing this man had immersed himself in, since his immersion in the waters of baptism, was pornography-which President Hinckley has termed, "the literature of Lucifer."[7]
Therefore, this man didn't have a reservoir of experiences with the Spirit, from which to draw-a reservoir that could have given him rejuvenating strength, for the rigorous days of change ahead.
At one point, when the process of change became so intensely discouraging, this man turned all of his feelings completely off!! "I have to numb myself" he told me. What a sad irony! This man, who had seen himself as being so passionate, was now unable to feel anything, for anyone. In every way, he was "past feeling."[8]
It was only as he avoided everything and anything that was sexually explicit, or even suggestive, and only as he regularly and relentlessly immersed himself in experiences with the Spirit, that the evil "rotation" of his eyes was corrected.
Slowly, he began to see that if he wanted real excitement in his life, obedience to the Lord's commandments was the only way to go. He had learned by sad experience that while sin looks exciting, sin and its consequences are pathetically predictable!
He started to see that while obedience used to look so boring, he soon discovered that it is obedience that unlocks the door to a thrill a minute. He came to experience that when the Lord knows He can trust you, it's almost impossible to imagine what magnificent experiences await![9]
He began to see that purity and passion go together. That "pure passion"-meaning, that passion which has been purified by the Holy Ghost-and therefore, is magnified, expanded and enhanced--is always greater, in every way, than impure passion![10]
Young men and women, you of a noble birthright, pray for the purifying influence of the Holy Ghost, so that your passions are pure, and your vision, perfected.
If your eyes have been rotated by the adversary, pray for the Holy Ghost to correct and perfect your vision, to purify your feelings, to purify your passions. And then live, so that He can.
Pray relentlessly: in the morning and in the evening, when you're driving, shopping, sitting, studying. Pray when you are riddled with temptations-and when you are peacefully focused on life.
There is enough and to spare of power in the Atonement to correct and perfect our vision-and to purify our passions. When our passions are pure and we can see clearly, then, and only then, are we ready and able to participate in marital intimacy that is out of this world-because, it is not of this world!
We are all preparing for true marital intimacy-whether we are single-never married, soon-to-be married, recently divorced, sadly widowed , or happily married-And each and every one of our actions, thoughts and feelings either decrease or increase our ability to experience true marital intimacy.
The truth is: Anything that offends the Spirit-moves us away from true marital intimacy. And conversely, anything that invites and sustains the Spirit, move us toward true marital intimacy.
It really is as profoundly simple as that!
Each and every sexual experience a person engages in outside of marriage, moves him or her one step further away from ever enjoying true marital intimacy. While the adversary whispers- "just this once won't hurt".. . remember, that things are not always the way they appear to be. If you could see the damage "just once" does-you would run screaming into the hills, at the very thought of being unchaste!!
Each and every time we see or hear something that is sexually explicit, the Spirit is offended and flees, and we take another giant step away from true marital intimacy.
On the other hand, each and every time we pray with real faith and real intent for the Holy Ghost to purify our passions, each and every time we open our scriptures and seek an answer to a problem, each and every time we feast upon fasting, or help heal a wound we didn't cause, when we are kind to someone who is cruel to us, forgive someone who has wronged us, betrayed, belittled, or falsely accused us; when we forgive someone who has contaminated our lives with their sins, when we seek to understand just a little bit more about the power that is in the Atonement for US!-we take a giant step closer to true love.
Each and every time we pray to fill the measure of our creation, to fulfill the wonderful mission for which we were sent to earth, when we pray-to know how the Spirit speaks to us, to be shown how the Lord feels about us, to be tutored about our premortal assignments and commitments, when we pray-to know what else we should be praying for in our lives,
Each and every time we pray with power... we take one giant step forward in increasing our capacity for true marital intimacy.
Truly, things are not always the way they appear to be. However, as we purify ourselves, we can avoid the adversary's rotation of our eyes-that deadly rotation which skews our vision and distorts our thoughts and feelings.
If the adversary has rotated your eyes, what can you do right this week to stop him? If you will ask Heavenly Father, in the name of Jesus Christ, the Spirit will tell you.
And, what can you do right this week to invite the Spirit into your life, so that your correcting and perfecting eye surgery can begin? Again, if you will ask, the Spirit will tell you.
To those whose eyes are presently devilishly rotated, sexual experiences look like sheer entertainment. But to those with eyes to see-those with Spirit-corrected vision and Spirit-enhanced lenses-sexual intimacy is so much more!
Pure eyes, with perfect vision, can see that a husband and wife are never closer to the Lord, than when participating in true marital intimacy!
I promise you, you who are part of the most magnificent army ever on earth-the Lord's Royal Army, that as you immerse yourself in more and more experiences with the Spirit, making Him your constant companion, He will help you see things are they really are. (Jacob)
And your increased companionship of the Holy Ghost, will increase your personal purity, which will increase and expand your natural passions!! What passions?
Your passion to give and to receive love will enlarge, along with your passion for true marital intimacy, for love and for life, and your passion to be who you really are and "who you have always been."[11]
Your passion to complete your premortal assignments will increase, and you will desire more and more not to be distracted by the honors of men, or the wiles of the world!
Your passion to be ever increasingly pure will enlarge, and your passion to draw closer to the Savior than you ever have before-to attach yourself to Him-will grow stronger and stronger.
And what will become your most heart felt passion?
Your passion to become more and more like Him!!
My beloved brothers and sisters, I promise you, that as your passions are increasingly purified and magnified, and your vision increasingly perfected, that you will find love and happiness, joy and light and peace that are far beyond your wildest dreams!
And you WILL see things as they REALLY are! In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
Notes
[1] 1 Nephi 4:21
[2] 1 Nephi 4:24
[3] Alma 26: 12
[4] Alma 61:9
[5] Alma 60:7
[6] Truman G. Madsen audiotapes on Presidents of the Church
[7] GBH
[8] Moroni 9:20
[9] D&C 76:5
[10] Watson, Wendy L. (2001) Purity and Passion: Spiritual Truths about Intimacy that will strengthen your marriage. Salt Lake City: Bookcraft
[11] Sheri L. Dew