Thank you for coming today. It is a pleasure to be here with you.
Integrity is one of the great virtues.
I would like to thank each of you who shared your thoughts on the devotional discussion board. I wanted to share this comment from Lynda Cull, “Integrity means doing the right thing even when no one is watching or will ever know. It means asking for guidance from and truly listening to the Holy Ghost, then doing what you are prompted, even when it is the most hard thing.”
Tad R. Callister has offered this definition:
"Integrity is a purity of mind and heart that knows no deception, no excuses, no rationalization, nor any coloring of the facts. It is an absolute honesty with one’s self, with God, and with our fellowman."[1]Integrity is inseparably connected to exactness and honor and moves us toward truth, fairness, and justice.
Brother Callister went on to ask an important question:
"Does our integrity, our honor, have a purchase price—a dime, a thousand dollars, the approval of our peers, some physical pleasure, or temporary recognition? Is there some point at which our integrity can be purchased? Or is it priceless—not for sale at any price?"[2]Are we willing to gain financially for compromising our beliefs?
Are we willing to compromise our integrity to be held in esteem? Do we prefer status or advancement to truth, fairness, or justice?
Is physical pleasure outside of the laws of our Father in Heaven so desirable we would give up our honor?
Do we crave the spotlight so deeply we would betray the truth for a touch of its fleeting warmth?
Living with integrity is not easy. It is not as simple as doing or not doing certain things.
Integrity may require action, or integrity may require inaction. But integrity always requires courage and faith.
So how do we know if our action or inaction will build our integrity? In his talk entitled “Personal Integrity,”[3] Joseph B. Wirthlin reminds us of Mormon’s guidance:
"For behold, the Spirit of Christ is given to every man, that he may know good from evil; wherefore, I show unto you the way to judge; for every thing which inviteth to do good, and to persuade to believe in Christ, is sent forth by the power and gift of Christ; wherefore ye may know with a perfect knowledge it is of God.But whatsoever thing persuadeth men to do evil, and believe not in Christ, and deny him, and serve not God, then ye may know with a perfect knowledge it is of the devil; for after this manner doth the devil work, for he persuadeth no man to do good, no, not one; neither do his angels; neither do they who subject themselves unto him."[4]Our world has come to be accepting of unrighteous inaction, and righteous action is often frowned upon. Righteous inaction is often excused by self-interest masquerading as politeness. Real integrity does not make a refuge for evil or injustice. Inaction born of integrity sustains truth, fairness, and justice. Oftentimes, integrity requires righteous and unpopular action. Living with integrity is not the easy way and is rarely the popular way.
I had great examples of integrity growing up. My father and mother were two of the most honest and honorable people I knew. I wanted to be like them and tried to get my life off to a good start.
During my sophomore year in high school, I was attending a team basketball camp. One evening a man came onto our floor and started yelling at everyone to clean up. My roommate and I went into the restroom and helped clean, then returned to our room. As we entered, my friend swung the door shut. He was not aware the man was behind us, turning to come into our room, and the door shut in his face. He threw open the door, grabbed my friend, and pushed him up against the wall.
This was the first moment of choice for me. What did truth, fairness, and justice require? I did not have time for a long philosophical debate, so I chose to act with what I understood to be integrity. I stepped between my friend and this man, pulled the man's arms away, and made a youthful attempt to explain why he should not be assaulting my friend.
He was not pleased and invited my friend and me downstairs for disciplinary action. While working our way downstairs, we came to understand this unknown man was actually the head coach of the university’s men’s basketball team and the head of the camp we were attending.
When we met downstairs, the coach berated us and demanded my friend and I apologize to him. My friend stated he was sorry if he had done anything to offend and was allowed to return upstairs. I understood my friend’s comment and agreed with his response, but then the coach turned to me and demanded my apology. I refused. My determination then and now is that defending a weaker party who is being assaulted is not something to apologize for. In fact, doing so would be dishonest. The social status of the offender does not miraculously erase the injustice or inappropriateness of his actions.
I explained I was not sorry for my actions and was invited to leave the camp. There is much more to this story, involving lessons I learned from my father. But, for our purposes today, I will just state my father was told over the phone there was no need for him to come get me, and I would be allowed to stay at the camp; regardless, he drove all night to meet me in the morning and stood by my side as we went to meet with the coach, who, to his credit, apologized for his actions the night before.
After graduating from high school, I entered boot camp in the United States Marine Corps. One of the reasons I chose the marines was their declared respect for honor and integrity. I soon learned that just because an organization claims to support integrity, it does not mean each of the individuals involved chooses to do so.
My favorite drill instructor was a man of integrity. He held to his beliefs with unshaking courage. The problem for me was he believed members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints hated people like him. He was determined to save me from my misguided upbringing and took special care to provide me with additional training and physical rehabilitation opportunities. One day he found a chance to challenge my religious beliefs and we faced off during noon chow.
He sat the platoon in formation and ordered us to get out our MREs (or meals ready to eat). He then told us to open our accessory package and take out the coffee. This had never happened before, and I quickly understood where he was going. I had to make a decision. I determined to obey his orders until doing so would be a clear violation of my religious beliefs. I took out the packet and heard the drill instructor walking my way. We were only allowed to look straight forward so all I could see were those two big legs turning and stopping right in front of me. He ordered us to open the coffee packet, and I did. He then took the packet out of my hands and order us to tip back our heads, and I did. He ordered us to open our mouths and pour in the coffee, and he assisted me by pouring it into my mouth. Then he ordered that we eat the coffee. I could go no further. I tilted my head forward and spoke out in the only way we were allowed, “Sir, this private cannot eat or drink coffee, it is against this private’s religion.” As I spoke, a great cloud of powdered coffee sprayed out and covered his dress slacks. As his muscles began to twitch, I wondered if those would be my last moments. Unknown to me, another drill instructor had caught on to what was happening and stepped in. He ordered me away for punishment, but instead, he gave me a chance to spit out the instant coffee and wash it out of my mouth.
Weeks later, I was cleaning in the barracks and my favorite drill instructor, he was still my favorite, walked up beside me and stopped. I held the broom tightly, wondering what unique activity he had planned for me, but to my surprise, he just leaned in and said, “Adams, I have been reading that book of yours. There’s lots of good marines in that book. You been taught since you was a baby to be a marine, so if you mess up it's twice as bad as someone else messin' up.” With that profound apology and threat, he walked away. I didn’t have another verbal exchange with him until after graduation when he congratulated me for my integrity. It was one of the great honors of my life, and it demonstrated his integrity. He had made a mistake, and as best he could, he had made it right.
This was not the only challenge to my integrity while serving in the marines. There were others in authority who tried to force me to view pornography, drink alcohol, not attend religious services, and many others. I refused each. Not all of those experiences ended so well. However, in each and every case, I was blessed for striving to live up to my values.
When I had a chance to start graduate school in Florida, I was faced with another important choice. I had researched my professors and understood they would not share my ideals. One of my first classes was taught by a professor I knew did not share my political, educational, or religious values. Her first assignment was to write an essay describing our ideas for the best possible K-12 education policy. I knew honestly explaining my ideas for good education policy would be in direct conflict with hers.
To complicate matters, I was not yet admitted to the program and had to take a full-time student load for one semester, including her class, before the department would consider admitting me. I was working full-time, serving in a challenging calling, and was wholly unsure of success.
However, as an educator, I knew I would learn much more by honestly engaging with this and other similar activities. I decided to approach it honestly and was profoundly impressed when she and other professors chose to respect my ideas and challenge my reasoning rather than my integrity. This led to an amazing opportunity for growth that lasted throughout my graduate studies.
These stories may lead you to believe each time we choose to keep our integrity we will receive some kind of earthly reward. I am sorry to say that is not always true. Many times, you will pay a real price for choosing to maintain your integrity. In the stories I chose to share, the other individuals involved chose to maintain their integrity by respecting mine or correcting their actions. When this is not the case, bad things can happen. You may lose your standing at work, or maybe even your job. Friends may walk away, not wanting to be colored by their association with you. You may lose business opportunities, or much more.
The Lord does not always promise us worldly success if we keep His commandments, but He does promise blessings. In my experience, blessings always came when I chose to keep my integrity. The blessings were not always what I expected, but they were what I needed.
There have also been times in my life when my integrity was challenged and I failed. Those events have been just as important in my spiritual journey as were my successes. They involved seeking forgiveness through the Atonement of my Savior Jesus Christ. I have relied on my covenants connecting me to Him and His grace to restore my integrity and draw my heart and nature closer to His.
I have also come to understand private integrity is likely more important than public integrity. We must respect truth, fairness, and justice within ourselves privately as we do with others publicly. Honesty to self is one of the foundations of integrity. There is no room to excuse ourselves from any principle of the gospel, no matter what obedience may cost us.
Integrity also requires belief in the Lord’s love for you and acceptance of his grace. You must not heap guilt upon yourself for sins or other mistakes. Integrity includes respecting your true nature as a daughter or son of heavenly parents who have provided you everything you need to grow and develop on your journey back to them. This includes respect for and acceptance of the help provided by our Savior and brother Jesus Christ.
Respect for truth and admitting your shortcomings are key, but not guilt. Godly sorrow and the natural consequences of sin are appointed to help us understand our situation and motivate repentance. Guilt, however, can be a tool of the evil one, leading us to self-hatred and guiding us down a spiraling path of depression. Your Father in Heaven does not seek to punish you, but to help you feel His love. Elder Jeffery R. Holland, in his talk “Be Ye Therefore Perfect—Eventually,” stated:
"I believe that Jesus did not intend His sermon on this subject to be a verbal hammer for battering us about our shortcomings. No, I believe He intended it to be a tribute to who and what God the Eternal Father is and what we can achieve with Him in eternity."[5]This comes to you through the boundless charity of His Son Jesus Christ as He lifts you, heals you, and, with the sanctifying aid of the Holy Spirit, sanctifies you. The great key to living with integrity as a flawed individual is found in and through the grace of Jesus Christ. Elder Holland explained it in this way:
“'Yea, come unto Christ, and be perfected in him . . . ,' Moroni pleads. 'Love God with all your might, mind and strength, then . . . by his grace ye may be perfect in Christ.'[6] Our only hope for true perfection is in receiving it as a gift from heaven—we can’t 'earn' it. Thus, the grace of Christ offers us not only salvation from sorrow and sin and death but also salvation from our own persistent self-criticism. . . .Brothers and sisters, every one of us aspires to a more Christlike life than we often succeed in living. If we admit that honestly and are trying to improve, we are not hypocrites; we are human. May we refuse to let our own mortal follies, and the inevitable shortcomings of even the best men and women around us, make us cynical about the truths of the gospel, the truthfulness of the Church, our hope for our future, or the possibility of godliness. If we persevere, then somewhere in eternity our refinement will be finished and complete—which is the New Testament meaning of perfection."[7]We don’t find perfection in making excuses for disobedience or through uninformed disagreement. We find perfection in Christ, through His grace and mercy.
Many times, we talk about the blessings we can receive through integrity and expect those blessings to be temporal, social, or financial. Consider Joseph who was sold into Egypt. He lived with integrity but did not travel on a happy trail from one reward to another. He was made a slave by his brothers, he was cast into prison by a man he served faithfully, and he was forgotten by those he helped along the way. He kept his integrity and made the best of his sorrow.
His reward in the end was likely not what we think at first reading. It was not being allowed to run Potiphar's house or help in prison, nor was it being made second in all the land of Egypt. His reward was being reunited with his family, after their experiences had allowed them to make the changes necessary to restore their family. That was his great reward.
We do not need to be wealthy, powerful, or in a specific stratum of civic or Church leadership to gain our salvation. We need to be one of the humble followers of Christ. We need our integrity.
My efforts to maintain integrity have been richly rewarded. While I have received many additional blessings, this family photo shows the one for which I am most grateful. The Lord has provided me with the greatest desires of my heart and brought happiness and peace to our family beyond my expectations and confirmed the reality of continuation of these family blessings throughout eternity.
This has been brought into my life through the grace of Christ; this is my reward. Your gifts may be similar or very different. Your Heavenly Father knows what the best possible blessings are for you.
My friends, the Lord loves you and desires to bless you. He stands with open arms to receive you. I pray you will dedicate yourself to His cause and accept His love. Allow his grace to build your integrity until you receive this commendation, “Well done, thou good and faithful servant: thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord.”[8] I say this in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
Notes
[1] Tad R. Callister, “Becoming Men and Women of Integrity,” BYU Speeches, Dec. 6, 2011, https://speeches.byu.edu/talks/tad-r-callister/becoming-men-and-women-of-integrity/.
[2] Ibid.
[3] Joseph B. Wirthlin, “Personal Integrity,” Ensign, May 1990, https://churchofjesuschrist.org/study/ensign/1990/05/personal-integrity.
[4] Moroni 7:16–17.
[5] Jeffrey R. Holland, “Be Ye Therefore Perfect—Eventually,” Ensign or Liahona, Nov. 2017, https://churchofjesuschrist.org/study/ensign/2017/11/saturday-morning-session/be-ye-therefore-perfect-eventually.
[6] Moroni 10:30; emphasis added.
[7] Ibid.
[8] Matthew 25:21.