My dear Brothers and Sisters, it is extremely humbling and yet exciting to stand here today in this devotional setting. I am deeply honored that I would even be considered to speak to you and to let you know of my love for you and my love for the Lord.
I want you to know, too, that I have prayed and fasted much concerning what I am to say to you here today. I hope that you have prayed to so that the spirit of the Lord will be here and we will all be edified together. And I’m glad to see that you have brought your scriptures with you because I intend to use them as well.
The scriptures teach, “men are, that they might have joy.”[1] I have pondered that scripture for most of my life! I have always felt that men should have joy. But you sisters should know that that verse pertains to you as well!
So what does it mean to have joy? I hope you will forgive some personal experiences from my life, but they are the ones that seem to teach the greatest lessons.
My father and mother were attending BYU when they fell in love and were sealed in the Manti Temple. They were blessed to have six beautiful children! Okay, five beautiful children and one really intelligent one. They taught their 3 sons and 3 daughters the precepts of the gospel by both word and example. As each child grew in stature and testimony, all 6 of them became worthy to go to the temple and to be called to serve the Lord on missions throughout the world.
I, like Nephi, was truly born of goodly parents. They taught me to be happy. But I think one of the happiest moments of my life was to finally graduate from high school. Because of a promotion for my father, our family moved from San Diego to Los Angeles. I ended up going to three different high schools in my senior year. In my last high school, the school officials weren’t even sure I was going to graduate because of the differences in requirements. All I knew is that I had purchased my cap and gown and I was walking in that graduation, with or without their approval! I did get their approval and I did graduate. And I was so happy!
The reason why I was so happy was because now I could go on my mission! I couldn’t wait to serve the Lord on a mission. I went to South America, the Kentucky-Tennessee Mission. That’s south in America . . . Deep South. I even learned a new language! I loved serving the Lord and those good people there. I never knew a happier time in my entire life than teaching the gospel all the time! I knew that the mission was to last two years, and then I would graduate that part of my life and return home to be with my family. Again, although sad to leave those good people of my mission, I was very happy to hop on that plane and arrive at the Los Angeles International Airport. The plane arrived nearly a half an hour ahead of schedule. My heart could hardly contain itself as I waited for my turn to walk off the airplane and have that joyous reunion with my loved ones! When I walked into the terminal, there was no one there to greet me!!! I was too early! When I finally saw my family running into the terminal and being able to hug them all, I felt as Alma, the younger, meeting up with the sons of Mosiah after their wonderful mission experience. This had to be true JOY!!
After a short time at home, my father and I (mostly my father) decided that it was time for me to pursue another chapter in my search for happiness. So I left home for the happy hunting grounds of BYU in pursuit of an education . . . okay, an eternal companion. I must mention here that at that time there was somewhere around 28,000 students in attendance there. Even with that many people around, I never felt so alone in all my life. Was this joy? I knew that the Gospel was true and I continued to follow the spirit the best I could. And I found joy in serving in serving in church.
I found a good paying job that helped me buy a brand new car! This was joy!!! So I thought! I continued to be happy, even though I had not yet found “the one”! I was so happy, in fact, that I bought a license plate holder for my new car that expressed my joy. It read “Happiness is being Single”.
The path I was traveling soon took me back home again. It was there that my license plate holder had been seen by a member of my Stake Presidency. He extended a thorough interview and after signing my temple recommend said there could only be one other piece of paper that would be more valuable and bring more joy than the one he had just signed . . . that would be the one for the living ordinance . . . meaning getting sealed in the temple. And to help me with this search for “joy”, he would set up a series of interviews over the next six months. In the first two months, I was to report to him with a list of ten young women and their finest attributes. The following two months I would narrow that list down to three, and then the last two months I would narrow the list to one . . . and he said, “You can tell her before you tell me!”
Unbeknownst to him, I had started dating a young lady that was soon to be my bride! After six weeks of intensive dating and car repairs . . . a whole other story . . . we were engaged to be married, and I had to call that counselor in the stake presidency and cancel my interviews with him. I now knew what joy was! I had fasted and prayed many days, even been to the temple, and it had been confirmed to me that she was the one I was to marry!!! I only hoped that she had experienced the same feelings!! You see, she was waiting for a missionary . . . had been for nearly 18 months . . . just the wrong missionary!!! I convinced her that she deserved the best!!! So after another long six weeks of waiting and preparation, we were sealed in the Los Angeles Temple. Truly, this was joy!!! What could possibly bring more joy than this?
It wasn’t long before I found out I was to be a dad. More joy? You bet!! Our little family started coming . . . first a daughter, then a son, then another daughter, then another son! It was just like ordering out of the Sears catalog! We were blessed beyond measure, and our joy was full!! We’ve watched our children grow and develop their own testimonies of the gospel. We’ve watched them make choices and learn the consequences of those choices. We’ve laughed together when times have been good, cried together when things have been bad. We’ve also learned how different each one of them was from each other. Our two oldest children have both served missions and have chosen, not only to marry wonderful companions, but to be sealed to them in the holy temple. They now even have children of their own . . . yes, I’m a grandpa!! If you think being a mom or dad is great, just you wait!!! When my first grandchild arrived, I could hardly contain myself! I had to call my folks and let them know of the joy of this new arrival. They asked how it felt to be a grandpa. I guess it made me feel a little old . . . not any less happy, that’s for sure! Then I teased my dad, “How does it feel to be a great grandpa?” He replied, without any hesitation, “I’ve always been a great grandpa!”
As I think about the joy and happiness I have felt throughout my life, I’ve often wondered what has made my life different than anyone else that has been single and happy, married and happy, had children and grandchildren and been happy?
Elder Joseph Fielding Smith, quoting the Prophet Joseph Smith, said:
Happiness is the object and design of our existence; and will be the end thereof, if we pursue the path that leads to it; and this path is virtue, uprightness, faithfulness, holiness, and keeping all the commandments of God . . .
. . . (A)s God has designed our happiness – and the happiness of all His creatures, He never has – He never will institute an ordinance or give a commandment to His people that is not calculated in its nature to promote that happiness which He has designed, and which will not end in the greatest amount of good and glory to those who become the recipients of His law and ordinances.
George Q Cannon wrote:
Whence comes your enjoyment? Whence come the glorious feelings that you have when you feel the best? Do they come from the outside? Do external circumstances produce real happiness of the kind that I describe? Doubtless, they contribute to happiness; but the purist joy, the greatest happiness, that which is most heavenly proceeds from within. A man must carry the principles of happiness and the love of God in his own heart or he will not be happy.
Do you get the feeling that if we are to be happy, it is up to us? And depending on how really happy we are depends upon our faith and obedience to the commandments?
President David O. McKay said, “The first condition of happiness is a clear conscience. No man who does wrong or who is unvirtuous will be happy . . .”
Turn with me in your scriptures to the great conversion story of Alma the younger. If you will remember, he and several of the sons of Mosiah were going all over the place with a mission to destroy the church. It seems that Alma the elder had done all that he could possibly do to stop them, but found that he could do nothing more except to pray and leave it in the hands of the Lord. The Lord heard the prayers of Alma and sent an angel to help persuade Alma the Younger to do the right thing. The angel gave Alma the younger a choice – to remember the good things that the Lord had done for him and to repent and join back with the church, or he would be cast off and destroyed! I don't know about you, but if an angel appeared to me and gave me a choice, I think I would go with the better part! Especially if it meant obtaining more joy in my life. In the 36th chapter of Alma, we find Alma the younger recounting and testifying of his wonderful conversion to his son, Helaman. Starting with the 16th verse we read:
And now, for three days and for three nights was I racked, even with the pains of a damned soul.
And it came to pass that as I was thus racked with torment, while I was thus harrowed up by the memory of my many sins, behold, I remembered also to have heard my father prophesy unto the people concerning the coming of one Jesus Christ, a Son of God, to atone for the sins of the world.
Now, as my mind caught hold upon this thought, I cried within my heart: O Jesus, thou Son of God, have mercy on me, who am in the gall of bitterness, and am encircled about by the everlasting chains of death.
And now, behold, when I thought this, I could remember my pains no more; yea, I was harrowed up by the memory of my sins no more.
And oh, what joy, and what marvelous light I did behold; yea, my soul was filled with joy as exceeding as was my pain!
Yea, I say unto you, my son, that there could be nothing so exquisite and so bitter as were my pains. Yea, and again I say unto you, my son, that on the other hand, there can be nothing so exquisite and sweet as was my joy.[2]
Then as we look over to verse 24:
Yea, and from that time even until now, I have labored without ceasing, that I might bring souls unto repentance; that I might bring them to taste of the exceeding joy of which I did taste; that they might also be born of God, and be filled with the Holy Ghost (Alma 36: 24).
As we realize the difference between true happiness and pleasure, we begin to realize what Alma, the younger meant when he said, “Wickedness never was happiness.”[3]
True happiness and joy is conditional upon our obedience to the commandments. The fact that we are striving to be as obedient as we can, and working hard on being the best that we can, does not necessarily mean that we will be free from trials and discouragement. Sometimes those trials, or what I like to call challenges, help to teach us things about ourselves that we would never learn unless we were faced with them. Those challenges may test our deepest faith. They may teach us that the Lord is closer than we could ever imagine, or we may hear “Old Scratch” telling us that it’s okay to do our own thing.
If we listen to the adversary, we will find ourselves drifting in the opposite direction that the Lord would want us to go and our search for joy will be interrupted. The Lord may take a step or two back and let us make our own decisions, and let the consequences follow. If we continue to follow Satan, the spirit of the Lord will continue to withdraw from us and we will be left to fend for ourselves. We will lose our footings on that firm foundation and our grasp on the iron rod will be lost. Even if it is only for a moment, we may find ourselves wandering away from that path which is just and right and true, and our joy will begin to disappear. If we don’t realize quickly what is happening, and turn back to that iron rod, we might find ourselves drifting further and further away, with the possibility of never recognizing how far away we really are and the chance of never finding our way back.
Satan has a way of clouding our minds and encouraging us to do things we would not normally do! He may even get us to believe that we are too far away from that rod, our joy is lost, and we might as well give up and not even try to return. This is one of Satan’s greatest tools. If he can deceive us, get us discouraged and get us to go as far away from the gospel as he can, then he feels a great victory. The less joy he can get you to feel, the happier he is.
As a bishop, I have had many opportunities to work with those that have seemed to have lost that joy that we have been talking about. As a matter of fact, part of our ward boundaries includes the local jail. I have had many chances to “teach the spirits in prison”. There is one example I would like to share with you.
Let me tell you about a young lady who, even though she may have been raised in the church, made some decisions and choices which took her away from the church. She found herself with group of friends that did things that were not in keeping with the standards of the gospel. She gave in to peer pressure and soon found herself doing the same things they were.
She was arrested by the authorities and was sentenced to jail. She spent nearly 18 months without any contact from her family or friends or even the church. While she was in jail, her husband divorced her. Her son went with her ex-husband, and her daughter went to be raised with her mother. Can you imagine what it must have been like to be all alone in that kind of situation? Can you feel the loss of joy she must have experienced? You need to realize that in the jail, there’s not a lot for you to do. The atmosphere is not necessarily conducive to the spirit of the Lord. The feeling of joy does not abound there. Sometimes, when I visit, I feel the repentance process in full swing. There are many there that have realized their mistakes and are paying the price. Knowing that in order to have a fullness of joy, they need to repent for breaking those laws. There are others that feel no remorse and as soon as they are out, they will probably do the same thing all over again!
This young lady was beginning to understand what repentance was all about. She sensed the lack of joy and happiness all around her. She was willing to accept the consequences of her choices. When I was given the opportunity to meet with her and to feel of her spirit, much repentance had been made. She told me that she wasn’t even sure whether she was still a member of the church or not or if she could ever come back to the church. She did know that whether she was a member or not, she could still pray. She found herself praying for changes in her life. Her heart had softened. Even in jail, she was responding to the whisperings of the spirit. The Lord was answering her prayers, too, even though she was still having a hard time feeling the spirit.
She had been sentenced to serve out a term that included hard time in a federal prison up north, but by some divine intervention, rather than going to the State Pen, she was transferred here to do some of that time. She didn’t know exactly why the transfer was changed, but the Lord knew! It just so happens that her mother, who had been taking care of her daughter – her granddaughter – live close to this area, and they now have the opportunity of visiting her each week. Think of the great joy it must have been for her to see them both after such a long time of being alone. She mentioned how grateful she was to the Lord and His great blessing in sending her here to be with her family. I felt blessed to be able to visit her and to see some of the joy of the gospel come back into her heart. I wish I could say that she lived happily ever after and is now serving as a Relief Society President in some ward, but the story isn’t over yet. She still must pay the rest of her debt to society, but there is hope and joy that will come to her as she strives to be obedient to the commandments. That is a promise that He gives to all of us. And I have never known the Lord to ever renegotiate on His promises!
The most wonderful part about this great Plan of Happiness is the opportunity we have of making the Savior’s atonement effective in our own lives. We know it is there, and may know it works for others, but we must realize that it is there for each one of us on a personal basis. All we need to do is the best we can, and then look to Him for the extra help we may need!
Listen to what James E. Talmage has said on this subject:
Happiness leaves no bad after-taste, it is followed by no depressing reaction; it calls for no repentance, brings no regret, entails no remorse; pleasure too often makes necessary repentance, contrition, and suffering; and, if indulged to the extreme, it brings degradation and destruction.
True happiness is lived over and over again in memory, always with a renewal of the original good; a moment of unholy pleasure may leave a barbed sting, which, like a thorn in the flesh, is an ever present source of anguish.
Happiness is not akin with levity, nor is it one with light-minded mirth. It springs from the deeper fountains of the soul, and is not infrequently accompanied by tears. Have you never been so happy that you have had to weep? I have.
As a matter of fact, I felt that way not long ago as we waited in the sealing room of the Idaho Falls Temple. A young couple came into that room all dressed in white. You could sense the joy and happiness they felt just by looking at their countenances. After some inspired instruction by one who had been called, set apart and given keys to perform these eternal ordinances, they were sealed for time and all eternity. That in itself would have brought great joy to any couple! But what brought even greater joy to them and to all of us was when the door was opened again, and their children, all dressed in white, filed quietly into the room. They knelt beside their parents and were sealed to them forever. Words cannot express the joy and happiness that we all felt.
So how do we achieve true happiness? Is it a place we can go? Can we buy it in a store? What does it take to get it and what does it take to keep it?
Some of you may remember the young actress, Shirley Temple. She starred in many movies, but there is one particular movie called, “The Blue Bird of Happiness”. It’s a wonderful story of how she goes in search for true happiness. She searches everywhere, but her search leads her right back to her own home. She realized that the Blue Bird of Happiness was in her own heart! That, my good brothers and sisters is where we can find true happiness . . . right in our own hearts!
Some seventy years after the Savior had visited the people in America, Mormon tells us in 4th Nephi chapter 1 verses 15 and 16:
And it came to pass that there was no contention in the land, because of the love of God which did dwell in the hearts of the people.
And there were no envyings, nor strifes, nor tumults, nor whoredoms, nor lyings, nor murders, nor any manner of lasciviousness; and surely there could not be a happier people among all the people who had been created by the hand of God.
How do we become like that? Turn again with me in your scriptures to Alma chapter 48 and let’s read about Captain Moroni.
Starting with verse 11:
And Moroni was a strong and a mighty man; he was a man of perfect understanding; yea, a man that did not delight in bloodshed; a man whose soul did joy in the liberty and freedom of his country, and his brethren from bondage and slavery;
Yea, a man whose heart did swell with thanksgiving to his God, for the many privileges and blessings which he bestowed upon his people; a man who did labor exceedingly for the welfare and safety of his people.
Yea, and he was a man who was firm in the faith of Christ, . . .[4]
And now if you’ll jump over to verse 17:
Yea, verily, verily I say unto you, if all men had been, and were, and ever would be, like unto Moroni, behold, the very powers of hell would have been shaken forever; yea, the devil would never have power over the hearts of the children of men.[5]
Even in his young age Moroni was prepared to serve the Lord and put Satan in his place – as far away from him as he possibly could! His heart was right!
Young people, you live in the most chosen time of any in the scriptures! You are preparing to usher in the Second coming of the Lord! Could you possibly live in a happier time?!? I tell the young men in my ward that they are my Helaman’s Warriors. They are arming themselves with the sword of the spirit and the breastplate of righteousness. They are doing things now that are preparing them to be at the front of that great army that will help to usher in the 2nd coming of the Savior. You young men here today can also be part of that great army if you will prepare yourselves! Remember, “If ye are prepared, ye shall not fear.” You young women can be a tremendous influence for good! I know we talk much of Helaman’s Warriors, but it was their mothers that deserve most of the credit. No matter what your calling is in this life, be sure that your heart is right with the Lord and you will find that true joy that is promised in the scriptures.
How grateful I am to be alive in this day and age, to see each of you stand a little taller, be a little better, do a little more for your spouse or room mates; when all around us, so many seem to be getting away with a little more, being a little more dishonest, doing a little more to annoy your spouse or room mates, making it harder to feel the spirit.
If you want real joy and happiness in your own life, raise your own bar. Make those decisions that will bring you closer to Him. Pray a little more. Study a little harder. Bear your testimony a little more often. Brethren, use your priesthood righteously more often. Go to the temple more often. Prove to yourself that the Lord will bless you with increased joy and happiness. Don’t do it for anyone else but you! Don’t deceive yourself into believing that when something special happens; when you get your new car, when you finally find “the one”, when you get your degree, when you have children or grandchildren, when you remodel the house, then you will be happy . . . be obedient to His commandments and feel that great joy in your life now!
In Doctrine and Covenants 18:15 we read, “And if it so be that you should labor all your days . . . and bring, save it be one soul unto me, how great shall be your joy with him in the kingdom of my Father!”
But if you haven’t saved your own soul, where will your joy be?
I want you to know that happiness is being married to the same wonderful woman I fell in love with over 28 years ago. I love her. Happiness is having children that love the gospel, because they want to, not because you want them to. I love them too. Happiness is having grandchildren! Do I have to tell you that I love them too? I do! Happiness is knowing that the sealing powers are eternal. Happiness is doing the right thing, for the right reason, even if you don’t want to. True happiness and joy begins in our hearts as we strive to keep the commandments the very best that we can. That is when we find true joy!!
I bear you my witness of the truthfulness of this gospel. It is God’s Plan of Happiness. I testify that we will only be truly happy if our will comes in line with the Father’s will. If we will choose wisely. I testify that as we do choose wisely, the spirit will speak peace to our souls. And in a world where peace is hard to find, we will find the true rest that the scriptures talk about. I testify that our Heavenly Father lives and loves us. He hears and answers our prayers. He loves you and knows you by name! He would love nothing more than to bless you with that Eternal Joy that only He can bless you with, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
Notes
[1] 2 Nephi 2:25
[2] Alma 36: 16-21
[3] Alma 41:10
[4] Alma 48: 11-13
[5] Alma 48: 17