I hope in my remarks today we can have something of a conversation. Even though it is I who will do all of the talking, I hope you will do your part by listening and pondering, particularly if you will listen to that familiar voice inside your mind that speaks so clearly in such circumstances.
Rather than just prepare a talk for this devotional I have tried to prepare myself to hear and speak under the direction of that same spirit. My hope is that when we leave here today each one of us will know something important and personal that we didn't know or didn't see clearly when we came.
In homage to this academic setting I would like to begin our conversation today with a little poetry, and I thought perhaps something about crows might be helpful. About the time you were born an elderly American poet named John Ciardi was saying goodbye to the world. As his life wound down I suspect he may have been thinking about the relevance of a poem he had written years earlier entitled "About Crows." Among other things this poem speaks to you young crows as well as to those of us who qualify as old crows:
The old crow is getting slow; the young crow is not.
Of what the young crow does not know, the old crow knows a lot.
At knowing things, the old crow is still the young crow's master.
What does the old crow not know? How to go faster!
The young crow flies above, below, and rings around the slow old crow.
What does the fast young crow not know? Where to go![1]
That's about as deep into poetry as I can manage today. I mentioned that John Ciardi was elderly when he died. He was in fact about my age, so you can see that I too fit into the "elderly" category. I'm one of the old crows, and I suppose one of the hallmarks of age and experience is the not-so-subtle shift from asking "how do I go faster?" to asking "where am I going?" At any rate, for us old crows going faster is not much of an option any more.
Because you will be an old crow a lot longer than you will be a young crow, I thought perhaps I could share with you today an old crow perspective about where the winds of this world are sweeping us, and some of the anchors you can rely on to see you through your journey and help you arrive safely at your true destination. As Yogi Berra said (or should have said) "you can't get where you're not going."
With that as a backdrop, let's consider together where we are going and how we will know when we get there. I thought I could approach that today by asking: How can you live a successful life?
Let's start our discussion with an example I know best. Few things in my own life have been as elusive as success. Time and again when I thought I had finally found success the definition of that slippery notion evolved once again in my developing heart. Looking back, I can see that my perspective kept changing because the light of God was patiently tutoring me about who I am, why I am here, and where my destiny really lies. That tutoring, by the way, is still going on for me.
Growing up in a small Southern Utah town I thought success meant making the team, having good friends, getting good grades, and not getting caught doing stupid things. When I became a teenager success took on new meaning: having fun, being popular, getting a drivers license, getting a date, becoming independent. As a missionary, success seemed to be found only in finding, teaching, and baptizing investigators. By the time I received an undergraduate degree I was not only a new father but also a newly commissioned officer in the U.S. Army and success for me meant surviving an unpopular, violent war in Southeast Asia. When I emerged from graduate school and started to practice law, I was sure success meant finding clients, winning cases, and getting paid. In fact, since entering the workforce it has always been tempting to find success through having more money in the bank, a better house in the burbs, and a newer car in the garage.
What is your definition of success today and how will that change over time? Remember, you will be an old crow a lot longer than you will be a young crow. Will the list of things you anticipate contributing to your success include a better job, a bigger house, a newer car, more fashionable clothes, more fun, more toys, an iPad?
One of the real "a-ha" moments in the evolution of my own feelings on this subject came when I heard my elderly mother reflect that in her life she envied others of only three things: better soil, better education, and a better disposition. That those three things were the stuff of her dreams caused me to think deeply about the value of my own longings.
Obviously success means different things to different people, but one thing is clear: those of us who truly desire to be disciples of Jesus Christ must somehow come to understand and embrace His definition of success for us, which seems to be embodied in his words: "Therefore, what manner of men [and women] ought ye to be? Verily I say unto you, even as I am."
In stark contrast to such an exalted expectation, consider how many people are content to merely appear successful--what my Texas friends call "big hat, no cattle." Some folks simply ooze success, but if you look behind the curtain you often see them working hard to conceal personal, family, financial, or even religious lives that are more illusion than substance. Like reality television, their lives are often filled with more drama than direction.
As you probably already recognize, virtual success is virtually no success at all--especially in the context of being a disciple of Jesus Christ. Appearance, like attendance, is not the key indicator of discipleship. To be a disciple means to be a participant not just a spectator. The imperative for a disciple is to "come to Christ" not just "come to Church." As prophets today describe it, the Church must be in our lives but the gospel must also be in our hearts. For all of us, young and old, it is not enough to simply have a testimony, to feel and know, for that is only a beginning. We become true disciples only when we are doing and becoming, something we call conversion. And in the end even doing is not enough. It is only when we become like him that his grace is sufficient for us to be truly successful. Helping us become like Him is our Father's work and what our Savior paid such a dear price for.
As missionaries learn through their study of Preach My Gospel: "Our Father's plan for us to be successful in this life and to return to live with Him is called the gospel of Jesus Christ, with Jesus' Atonement at the center of that plan."[2] I find that explanation to be profoundly helpful. In God's view we can be successful in this life only to the extent that we embrace and live the gospel of Jesus Christ and are prepared to return to live with Him.
You and I are on a journey that began before we came to earth and for this journey to be successful you and I must follow the Son back into the presence of the Father. Your experiences here at BYU-Idaho can help you throughout your journey. Hopefully you have already learned that the help you need comes not only from the thick textbooks you pore over at night but also from the wondrous workings of the Holy Ghost that can infuse your life with light and knowledge. You are in the early days of your journey and the light and knowledge available at this university can help you climb the ladder of success. As you climb that ladder in the days ahead make sure it is never leaning against the wrong wall.
As I said earlier, success in life is not always what it appears to be. Take my earlier example of missionary work. I said that as I young missionary I was under the impression success only came through finding, teaching, and baptizing investigators. Consider what missionaries today learn about success from their study of Preach My Gospel: "Your success as a missionary is measured primarily by your commitment to find, teach, baptize, and confirm people and help them become faithful members of the Church who enjoy the presence of the Holy Ghost."[3]
In the end it is a missionary's commitment to pursue a course that is pleasing to God that determines whether or not their mission is successful. So it is in life. It is the level of our commitment to pursue a course pleasing to God that determines whether we will be successful in this life or not. Preach My Gospel gives all of us insight into how God views success. Consider these words:
You can know you have been a successful missionary when you: Love people and desire their salvation.
Obey with exactness.
Live so that you can receive and know how to follow the Spirit, who will show you where to go, what to do, and what to say.
Develop Christ-like attributes.
Work effectively every day, do your very best to bring souls to Christ, and seek earnestly to learn and improve.
Help build up the Church wherever you are assigned to work.
Warn people of the consequences of sin. Invite them to make and keep commitments.
Teach and serve other[s].
Go about doing good and serving people at every opportunity.[4]
These truths have wonderful application beyond missionary work. I believe you can know you are having a successful life when you do these same things. Preach My Gospel concludes its discussion of success with these hopeful and helpful thoughts, not just for missionary work but for life itself:
"Avoid comparing yourself to others and measuring the outward results of your efforts against theirs. When you have done your very best you may still experience disappointments, but you will not be disappointed in yourself. You can still feel certain that the Lord is pleased when you feel the Spirit working through you."[5]
If you take nothing more from our brief time today than an internalization of these few words you will be well on your way toward success in life.
Let me mention another construct that I think can help you navigate a course through life that will lead to the success you most desire. In last April's General Conference, Elder Dallin H. Oaks painted a remarkably clear picture of a cause-and-effect process when he said: "Desires dictate our priorities, priorities shape our choices, and choices determine our actions. The desires we act on determine our changing, our achieving, and our becoming."[6] Desire, which is the title of his talk, lies at the heart of this process of becoming and I encourage each of you to re-read his talk. In the context he created perhaps I could share with you some reflections on another side of this quadrilateral: choice. Choice had its origins long before we came to this earth. Indeed, the moral agency to choose is one of the pillars of our Father's plan for us to be successful in this life. You were born into this life without direct knowledge of the moral universe around you. You don't remember your pre-mortal actions, your relationship with God, or the eternal consequences of your choices. Through the gift of agency you have the ability and privilege to choose and act for yourself throughout your life, and so you have quite naturally come to believe you have the power to do whatever you want. So, you choose and the choices you make throughout your life will reveal your true nature and you will become what your choices reveal you to be.
What will you choose--and what will you become as a result of your choices?
As you can imagine the scriptures give us great insight into the Lord's counsel on choosing. Let's read one of those scriptures. In the seventh chapter of Moses, a conversation between the prophet Enoch and the Lord is recorded. At one point in this narrative they both view all the people of the earth who have chosen poorly, and suddenly the Lord begins to weep. Enoch is astounded that God could weep and asks him why and "The Lord said unto Enoch: Behold these thy brethren; they are the workmanship of mine own hands, and I gave unto them their knowledge, in the day I created them; and in the Garden of Eden, gave I unto man his agency...And unto thy brethren have I said, and also given commandment, that they should love one another, and that they should choose me, their Father..."[7]
In this simple description of our Father's plan for our success the Lord says through His tears that He gave us knowledge and agency and only asked two things of us: to love one another and to choose Him; yet those people he and Enoch were observing had apparently done neither, and He wept over what they were becoming.
Our choices reveal our true nature and we will become what our choices reveal us to be, and it is only in choosing Him that we can become like Him.
A good example of choosing Him came to my attention just a few days ago when I read a newspaper article about Will Hopoate, a young member of the Church in Australia. Let me quote from that article:
"A decision made by 19-year-old Will Hopoate, one of the biggest stars in Australian rugby, is making headlines in Australia these days, as he announced his decision to leave professional rugby at the end of the season to serve a two-year mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. In doing so he is forsaking millions [of dollars]. 'At the end of the day it was all my decision. This is what I want to do,' Hopoate told the media in a press conference. Many are struggling to understand why Hopoate, a hot commodity in the National Rugby League, is choosing this moment to forgo the wealthy, celebrity life of a pro athlete and serve a mission. He said the decision to go on a mission is something he has always considered. His family supports his choice to serve, but he emphasized to reporters that serving a mission has been 100 percent his decision. 'I was brought up in the Mormon faith. This is who I am and what I want to do,' the young rugby star said."
"This is who I am and what I want to do." Those words ought to be part of every important decision you and I make in this life. Can you see from Will's experience how desires dictate our priorities and priorities shape our choices and choices determine our actions and the desires we act on determine our changing, our achieving, and our becoming?
What would you do if you were faced with a similar choice? What are your desires? What are your priorities? What would you choose? What would you do? In one way or another you and I will face a decision like Will Hopoate faced a few weeks ago. Such choices are an essential and inevitable part of God's great plan for us to discover for ourselves whether or not we will choose Him. Such choices are the ultimate test of godhood.
As I read of Will Hopoate's unfolding story, my mind went back to an experience President Gordon B. Hinckley spoke of almost 20 years ago. It is another example of a young man faced with substantial choices. President Hinckley says:
"Mine has been the opportunity to meet many wonderful men and women in various parts of the world. A few of them have left an indelible impression upon me. I share with you a story I spoke of some years ago. I met a naval officer from a distant nation, a brilliant young man who had been brought to the United States for advanced training. Some of his associates in the United States Navy, whose behavior had attracted him, shared with him at his request their religious beliefs. He was not a Christian, but he was interested...they taught him the gospel of the Master. The Spirit touched his heart, and he was baptized.
He was introduced to me just before he was to return to his native land. We spoke of these things, and then I said: 'Your people are not Christians. What will happen when you return home a Christian, and, more particularly, a Mormon Christian?' His face clouded, and he replied, 'My family will be disappointed. They may cast me out and regard me as dead. As for my future and my career, all opportunity may be foreclosed against me.' I asked, 'Are you willing to pay so great a price for the gospel?' His dark eyes, moistened by tears, shone from his handsome brown face as he answered, 'It's true, isn't it?' Ashamed at having asked the question, I responded, 'Yes, it's true.' To which he replied, 'Then what else matters?'"[8]
This is who I am and what I want to do! It's true isn't it? Then what else really matters? I don't believe we could end our conversation about choosing and success today without considering what some very knowledgeable old crows have learned and shared about those two commandments we read about earlier: loving one another and choosing Him. As we do so I believe you will be able to see that these two simple commandments are the very things that lead to a successful life.
Let me start with the recent words of the most inspired and experienced voice on earth. During a Dixie College commencement address a few weeks ago President Thomas S. Monson observed: "During your life you may achieve wealth or fame or social standing. Real success, however, comes from helping others... My young friends, your life will be fuller, richer and happier if you seek for and find opportunities to be of service."[9]
Real success comes from helping others. Any idea why would that be true? Remember, the Savior said, "By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another."[10] The Son has become like His Father and His Father is defined by love. When we choose Him he asks us to love one another as he loves us. We become like Him by choosing Him and the way he wants us to choose him is by loving one another.
During our recent General Conference Elder M. Russell Ballard described it this way:
"Brothers and sisters, the gospel of Jesus Christ is simple, no matter how much we try to make it complicated. We should strive to keep our lives similarly simple, unencumbered by extraneous influences, focused on those things that matter most... It is only when we love God and Christ with all of our hearts, souls, and minds that we are able to share this love with our neighbors through acts of kindness and service--the way that the Savior would love and serve all of us if He were among us today."[11]
The way we become like him is to choose him and the way he wants us to choose him is by loving one another.
Clayton Christensen, formerly one of my brethren in the Seventy, a close friend of President Clark, and a Harvard business professor, put it this way:
"I've concluded that the metric by which God will assess my life isn't dollars, but the individual people whose lives I've touched. I think that's the way it will work for us all. Don't worry about the level of individual prominence you have achieved; worry about the individuals you have helped become better people."[12]
It sounds like all these old crows are in their own way telling us that success in this mortal journey comes from loving and helping our fellow travelers.
I want to thank you for allowing me to visit with you today. As I look into your faces I see the brightness of hope that comes from having the Spirit of God and I feel a reassurance that the true principles of which we have spoken today are in good hands in the years to come. Thank you for coming to this wonderful university, for wanting to learn and grow and do and become.
As we conclude our conversation today I want to invite you to love one another and to choose God, over all else, for the remainder of your life. If you do, I promise you will live a successful life. God will give you His power and you will become like Him. If you do not, in the end it will not matter what else you have chosen.
Notes
[1] John Ciardi, "About Crows", Fast & Slow, Mar. 1975, 3
[2] Preach My Gospel, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Jan. 2005, 32
[3] Preach My Gospel, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Jan. 2005, 10
[4] Ibid
[5] Ibid
[6] Dallin H. Oaks, "Desire," Ensign, April 2011, 42
[7] Moses 7:32-33
[8] Gordon B. Hinckley, "It's True, Isn't It?" Ensign, July 1993
[9] Thomas S. Monson, "Three Bridges to Cross", Dixie State College Commencement Address, May 2011
[10] John 13:35
[11] M. Russell Ballard, "Finding Joy through Loving Service," Ensign, April 2011, 46
[12] Clayton Christensen, "How Will You Measure Your Life?" Harvard Business Review, July/August 2010