Here we are tonight sitting side by side (wherever you are), gathering strength from the Spirit of the Holy Ghost and from each other. I believe our Heavenly Father is very much aware of us, his daughters, here tonight. His love for us is evidenced in that fact that He gave His Only Begotten Son so that we could return to Him. I believe He would say to us, if He were here, "I gave you my Son--use Him." He wants us to turn to Him with every need. Nothing is unimportant to our Father if it is important to us. God wants us to come to know Him and His Son, Jesus Christ, for "this is life eternal, that they might know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent."[1]
We knew God the Father and His Son Jesus Christ in the premortal existence, yet we stepped through the veil, and now we are trying to relearn what we once knew. This earth life is actually a very short time in the perspective of eternity. The Apostle James asked, "For what is your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away."[2] We must make good use of our present time on earth to come to know our Father and His Son again. No wonder we hear in the sacrament prayer each week, "that they are willing to take upon them the name of thy Son, and always remember Him."[3] For President Ezra Taft Benson said, "Nothing is going to startle us more when we pass through the veil to the other side than to realize how well we know our Father and how familiar His face is to us."[4] I pray tonight that we may remember Him and feel an abundance of His love.
It's interesting--as women of the Church, we may not know each other's hearts, but we do feel empathy for one another. We may not know each other's burdens, but we know we all carry them--so we gather together at times like this, giving glances of hope.
In Acts 4 we read, "And the multitude of them that believed were of one heart and of one soul."[5] I believe the Quaker proverb "Thee lift me and me lift thee, and together we'll ascend to heaven" could be an unspoken truth among the women of the Church. Our lives are different, our ages different, our circumstances and languages are different, yet we share a common goal--that of eternal life, where we can again live in God's presence. And with that "unspoken truth," we link arms, and we are all about helping each other get there.
Hence the title of my message tonight: "Live in the Present, but Keep Your Eye on Eternity."
As we live in the present (each one of us in our cubby holes of life), we must keep our eyes on eternal life. Elder Bruce C. Hafen said, "We can have eternal life if we want it, but only if there is nothing else we want more."[6] So, tonight, let's put our heads together and explore how we can better do just that.
Think about what is your present focus in life. Ask yourself these questions: "What is my main purpose each day?" or "If my life were a book, what would be the title?" The answer to these questions will help you define your "present." Do you have it? Now, with your focus in mind, ask, "How do I make sure I see eternity each day?"
I would like you to turn to the sister next to you or a little group of you and discuss that very question: "How do I see eternity in my life each day?"
[AUDIENCE DISCUSSION]
I need two volunteers--the first one up to come over this way and one to come over this way--to share with us what you just learned. Will you tell us your name first?
NAGATA: Candace Nagata.
WIXOM: Candace, thank you for coming. And what's your station in life? What's your season in life?
NAGATA: I am a mother of five children, and I get to serve in our Relief Society presidency.
WIXOM: Lucky you. And you have beautiful blue eyes.
NAGATA: Thank you.
WIXOM: How do you daily focus on eternity?
NAGATA: I had mentioned making sure to make the time in our busy schedules to find some quiet, to be able to pray to our Heavenly Father and listen and to take time to study our scriptures. And in my cute gathering of women, they had wonderful ideas too about recognizing the tender mercies of the Lord throughout your day and His hand in your life. And another sister mentioned the technology that she carries within her hand and the opportunity, wherever she is, if she has a quiet moment, to look for some inspiration in a church talk or in some scriptures just within the technology she carries. And I thought those were great ideas.
WIXOM: They are great ideas, and you are great. Thank you so much for sharing. You see, you didn't need me. The real wealth is right there, sitting next to you.
Tell us your name.
ROBBINS: Carol Robbins.
WIXOM: Carol, what's your season of life?
ROBBINS: Three kids and a newborn.
WIXOM: Thank you for coming tonight. Tell us, how do you focus on eternity?
ROBBINS: I can't take credit for this one; the woman that I turned to told me this. This station of life is cleaning, laundry, dishes, vacuuming, keeping the kids clean all day long. And I asked her, how do I keep the eternal perspective? How is this preparing me for eternity? And she said it's how we go about that day, how we treat our kids, how we treat our husband. And that's when the light clicked. That's right. We can do those things and not feel guilty. It's how we go about doing it.
WIXOM: It's not what we do; it's how we do it. You're beautiful. Thank you, Carol.
President Monson said, "Moments of clarity come to all of us one time or another ... and we see clearly what really matters in our lives."[7]
So let's begin with the question "How I do I find the time in my 'present' life to discover clarity to see eternity?"
Anne Morrow Linbergh's book Gift from the Sea is a favorite book of mine. If you can't go to the beach and rediscover yourself like she did, at least you can read her book. She said, "We choke the space [of our lives] with continuous music, chatter, and companionship," and I might add social media, "to which we do not even listen. It is simply there to fill the vacuum. When the noise stops there is no inner music to take its place. We must re-learn to be alone.... There is a quality to being alone that is incredibly precious. Life rushes back into the void richer, more vivid, fuller than before."[8]
Have you discovered the peace you can feel when you are alone, when the world is quiet and your thoughts explore into the corners of your mind, when you can quietly pray and talk to God and then take the time to listen for His response? Jeremiah teaches us there is rest for those who quietly walk with God. He said, "Thus saith the Lord, Stand ye in the ways, and see, and ask for the old paths, where is the good way, and walk [walk with God] therein, and ye shall find rest for your souls."[9] "Be still, and know that I am God"[10]
These thoughts take us to the theme of "sacred idleness." Boyd Matheson wrote an article entitled "'Sacred Idleness' Is a Balm for Weariness" in the newspaper. He said:
We can become weary by attempting to do too much, trying to please everyone, ... holding a grudge, being in a hurry, needlessly worrying, being forever tethered to technology and even by not being clear about what really matters....
Sacred idleness is not about escaping reality, mindlessly watching TV, sleeping late, surfing social media, or justification for doing whatever feels good.
Rather, it is a focus on sacred things that renew, rejuvenate and restore. The word "sacred" does not necessarily equate to things related to religion or spirituality.... It is important to note that the word sacred is also defined as something highly valued, something set aside or even set apart, for a specific purpose....
In the New Testament, Christ taught his apostles this important principle of sacred idleness and rest. In Mark 6:30-32: "And the apostles gathered themselves together unto Jesus, and told him all things, both what they had done, and what they had taught.
"And he said unto them, come ye yourselves apart into a desert place, and rest a while."
Mr. Matheson said, "Christ was giving the apostles a chance to have a moment of sacred idleness.... He was not taking them on a weekend spa retreat. My guess is that there was a lot of work and study out there in the desert."
For you young mothers, Elder Neal A. Maxwell: "We rest and have some solitude in order to better serve those who may contribute to our fatigue."
Mr. Matheson said when the Lord said to his disciples "peace, be still" while they were on the raging sea and about to perish, perhaps "the Savior was not really speaking to the wind and the waves! [Perhaps he] was speaking to his disciples."
In the end, sacred idleness is about pursuing small moments that matter. It is making time for yourself, and those you care about, to do things that are important, rejuvenating and set aside for your purposes. Activities that give you energy back are sacred.... [Listening to inspiring music], ... breathing deeply, writing, [reading the scriptures, prayer] or simply forcing yourself to be still. Amazingly, sacred idleness can also be found in serving others, meaningful dialogue, reaching out or simply looking within.[11]
Mr. Matheson's article spoke to me. Focusing on those "small moments that matter" is what allows us to live in the present while we keep our eye on eternity. I smile when I think of you and the busy lives you lead. Whether you are immersed in study, work, motherhood, grandmotherhood, or a combination of the above, you are living your life at full throttle, and I salute you. Each one of you is His precious daughter, and our Father and His Son hover to help on this path back to them.
Another question: How do we take control of our present lives? We know, here on earth, we are laying up for ourselves treasures in heaven. The adversary wants us to keep busily engaged in a multitude of trivial things in an effort to keep us distracted from a few treasured vital things.
Here is the clue: Seek God's light, seek His will, and decide, what are the big things in life? What is essential? Then all else pales in that perspective. When we focus on what is essential, confusion dissolves, and we are not vulnerable to blowing in the wind. We must be cautious to not take our validation, what we think about ourselves, from a horizontal perspective by comparing ourselves to others. Immersing ourselves in social media like Instagram and Facebook can take the wind out of our sails. Rather, we must take our validation vertically, from God. The question we ask is not "What will others think?" but "What will God think?" Then we put our energy and focus in His direction.
Sisters, the treasures here on earth that will allow us to lay up treasures in heaven are the covenants we make with God. That is what is essential, and we cannot be casual about living them. Our covenants are our day-to-day willingness to bear one another's burdens, that they may be light; ... [To] mourn with those that mourn; ... and comfort those that stand in need of comfort, and to stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things, and in all places.[12]
And listen to this: "Our covenants are our willingness to take upon ourselves the name of Jesus Christ, which means to see ourselves as His is a priceless treasure. We put Him and His work first in our lives. We seek what He wants rather than what we want or what the world teaches us to want."[13]
These covenants are at the very heart of our earth-life experience. Every decision we make should be made with those promises in mind, and we should not expect it to be easy. This "present life" was not meant to be easy. We are covenant-making women, and we are strong. We can see bits of heaven here on earth, and we want heaven in the future in the form of eternal life with God. The world may not see the beauty of that truth. But Elizabeth Barrett Browning did when she wrote the poem we all love:
Earth's crammed with heaven,
And every common bush afire with God,
But only he who sees takes off his shoes;
The rest sit round it and pluck blackberries.
The world is just beginning to see the power and influence of covenant women and men on this earth. We know that when we let these sacred promises drive our focus in life, it will lighten our burdens and prioritize our decisions. There is an abundance of a feeling of "pure peace" that comes with living our covenants.
Now, does this mean that all fun, fashion, yummy food, and spontaneity go out the window? Of course not, but these things are incidental to our real purpose in life. Like the pioneers, their destination was Zion, yet among the intense hardships along the way, there was always music, dancing, and laughter. They gathered strength from each other, and their joy was doing it together. If we as "Mormons" can't have fun--crazy fun--on our journey, we are missing a piece of joy, for "men are that they might have joy."[14] So we enhance our lives with our creativity while we seek Him and keep the covenants. I love that plan!
No wonder a good friend of mine, when his aged father was about to pass away, said his father's last words were "Keep your covenants to bless your family."
Each one of us in this room has a story, a story of faith and humble effort to keep the covenants we have made. We are not perfect, even though we would like others to perceive we are. Covenant keeping is about trying, sometimes failing, but getting up and trying again.
Elder Neal A. Maxwell described this path we are on when he said, "Our perfect Father does not expect us to be perfect children. He had only one such Child. Therefore, sometimes with smudges on our cheeks, dirt on our hands and shoes untied, stammeringly, but smiling we present God with a dandelion--as if it were an orchid or a rose! If for now the dandelions the best we have to offer, He receives it knowing what we may later place on the altar. It is good to remember how young we are spiritually."[15] Thank you, Elder Maxwell!
Living this gospel is all about progressing--becoming while focusing on eternity--with an eye single to His glory.
May I share with you the stories of three women, Patricia, Aurelia, and Joanie? They, like you and me, were trying with the Lord's help to keep the covenants they had made.
When Patricia Pinegar, a past general Primary president, was a young mother of four children, she loved light, order, and calm feelings. She said, "I always wanted the floors to be clean to help contribute to that feeling of calm, but it was difficult to do with toddlers. As a result, I vacuumed a lot." One day her husband, Ed, came home early and she was vacuuming. He gave her a big hug and then jokingly said, "I know what you'll be doing in the eternities--you'll be the chief vacuumer." She said, "I knew he was kidding, but my life felt out of control. I thought, NO!" The next day, she got a babysitter, took a stack of paper and her scriptures, and went fasting to her parents' cabin in the mountains. She spent the day sorting out her life and taking control. She prayed, wrote pages of lists, and prioritized everything. She defined that returning to her Heavenly Father with Ed, her husband, and her children was top priority. The promises she had made on this covenant path were most important. The things that came next were those things that would help her get there, such as scripture study, temple attendance, family home evening, and teaching their children. Cleaning the drawers in the bathroom fell to the bottom of her list. Then, as an exercise in returning to faith and values, she drew up a plan and overlaid her list on the calendar so things would happen. This was a monumental time in her life. She went home excited because she knew where she wanted to go.
She shared her experience with Ed, and he willingly went through the same priority-setting exercise with Patricia. She said, "This was a wonderful turning point in our marriage. We talked weekly about our goals and attended the temple regularly, with a focus on each of our children.[16]
Now, we may not have access to a cabin in the woods or even a full day where we can escape our daily life, but we do have access to prayer, fasting, our scriptures, and a notepad of paper. Time spent seeking personal revelation for ourselves and our family with an eternal perspective is time well spent.
I recently asked a friend who is serving in Primary, "What have you learned from this experience of serving in Primary?" Her response surprised me; it was most interesting. She said, "I have learned the importance and the blessing of truly loving my husband." Then she explained, "For when I love my husband and try to live the covenants, my love increases for everyone, especially for the children in Primary, and it affects every part of my life."
Next, I would love for you to meet Aurelia, in San Pablo, in the Philippines. Aurelia was petite, with dark eyes and black hair simply cut in a dutch cut. She hesitated to smile because she had so few teeth in her mouth, but her countenance radiated. Her home was at the top of a hill in a clearing in a grove of mahogany trees. She was a widow with 10 children. Six of her children were married. One son recently had returned home from a mission. He had walked up that same path we had walked earlier that day, through the mahogany trees, to get to the clearing he called home. Her two daughters were young women in the branch. They were dressed modestly and beautiful. Little Joseph, age eight, was the youngest, a good student and helpful to his mother. Her family's home consisted of plywood boards framing the single-room structure. Their family mainly existed outdoors with wooden benches for chairs and chickens roaming free. They had to go a distance for water, using the big plastic water jugs they stored in the clearing. Like all of us, Aurelia asked herself, "What matters most?" What do I want my children to hold on to? By her actions she answered: the gospel of Jesus Christ and the sacred covenants we revere. She was teaching her children about baptism and the gift of the Holy Ghost and the blessing of the sacrament each week and what they could do each day to live their covenants. She would gather her family for family prayer. The strength of priesthood power existed in her home because of temple covenants she has made with her husband, and she continues to keep even after his death. She was intentionally teaching her children to trust and obey Jesus Christ. Her children watched her deal with the daily crisis of life while they truly held on to each other.
After standing in that clearing--I call it "sacred ground"--and sharing a family prayer and singing the Primary song "Families Can Be Together Forever," we prepared to say goodbye. I bent down to pick up my small purse I had placed on a tree stump. There, curled up on my bag, was a kitten. As I looked down, I glanced at Aurelia's feet. She was wearing plastic flip-flops like many Filipinos, and I noticed her toenails were painted bright red. I smiled. She was, like you and me, still a woman who, amidst her circumstances of simplicity, had found an ounce of joy in nail polish.
Now, let me tell you about Joanie. On January 27, 2016, Joanie Daily passed away from breast cancer. It seems appropriate that I would speak about her today. She was a beautiful, vibrant 57-year-old woman. Healthy and energetic, she ran over 20 marathons in her life. A devoted wife, faithful mother to four handsome boys, a grandmother to three precious grandchildren, and a high school teacher. Joanie and I share those three grandchildren. In fact, Maggie, age eight at the time, loved her grandma Joanie so much she asked her mother if she could speak at her grandma Joanie's funeral. Maggie did so well. It was tender. If you had driven by Skyline High School that week, you would have seen the pink ribbons tied to trees, lampposts, and road signs for blocks surrounding the school. Joanie had influenced thousands of students with her service-oriented Community of Caring Class at Skyline. She lived in the present. Her life was about serving others. It began with her family, church, and then community.
Just days before she passed away, Joanie reflected on her life. She experienced the moment President Monson must have meant when he referred to those "moments of clarity [that] come to all of us at one time or another ... [and we see what] really matters in our lives."[17]
Joanie wrote, "I have come to realize a few qualities and activities that have enriched my life and that matter most to me. I would like to share them with you."
Here are the 10 things she wrote:
1. Spend time with family. Nothing is more important.
2. Testimony of the gospel. Don't let the philosophies of men influence you. Embrace the spiritual.
3. Prayer is sacred.
4. Scripture study--make time to read and study these sacred works.
5. Never forget you are a daughter of God. Reach up. He will always take your hand.
6. Temple attendance, temple covenants, and temple work for our ancestors. This has blessed my life immensely.
7. Be honest with each other. I have trifled with silly things at times and have been grateful for a friend's advice.
8. Continue serving individually and collectively. Service blesses both the giver and the receiver. I love to serve!
9. Keep getting outside in nature and enjoying the beauty of the Creation.
10. Continue to be respectful and non-judging. Be kind!
If you were to write the qualities and activities that have enriched your present life and that matter most to you, what would you write?
We can "lift up [our hearts] and rejoice, and cleave unto [our] covenants,"[18] as the Lord told Emma Smith. We can, like Paul says, "Fight the good fight of faith, [and] lay hold on eternal life"[19] Our covenants are a gift from our Heavenly Father--our Father we have known from before this life. Nephi saw our day when he said, "I ... beheld the power of the Lamb of God, that it descended upon the saints of the church of the Lamb, and upon the covenant people of the Lord, who were scattered upon all the face of the earth; and they were armed with righteousness and with the power of God in great glory."[20]
We are not alone, and the Lord does not want us to do "this present life" all by ourselves. As we get up each morning and begin our day, He is hovering nearby, waiting for the moment we connect with Him in prayer, and He "will go before your face ... and be on your right hand and on your left"[21] throughout your day. How do I know that?
In October of 2015, at the conclusion of a General Authority meeting, President Henry B. Eyring spoke to the brothers and sisters in the room. This is what I wrote in my personal journal. "President Eyring said, 'Here we are talking about the programs of the Church. Heavenly Father and His Son, I think, are aware of us today. I think they are smiling. They see we are trying.' President Eyring said, 'I think I got the message from them. They are saying, "We would like to help them if they would allow us."' Let me repeat that. President Eyring said, 'Our Heavenly Father and His Son, Jesus Christ, were saying, "We would like to help them if they would allow us.'" Can you feel the love in those words?
We can allow them to help us by staying close to them in prayer and keeping our covenants as we live in the present each day but keep our eye on eternity.
In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
Notes
[1] John 17:3
[2] James 4:14
[3] D&C 20:77
[4] "Jesus Christ--Gifts and Expectations," Speeches of the Year, 1974, Provo: Brigham Young University Press [1975], 313. We know Him!"
[5] Acts 4:32
[6] Bruce C. Hafen, "The Atonement: All for All," Ensign, May 2004
[7] Thomas S. Monson, "The Race of Life," Ensign, May 2004
[8] Anne Morrow Lindbergh, Gift from the Sea [1955], 36
[9] Jeremiah 6:16
[10] Psalms 46:10
[11] Boyd Matheson, "Sacred Idleness Is a Balm for Weariness," Deseret News, Dec. 27, 2016
[12] Mosiah 18:8-9
[13] True to the Faith, 23
[14] 2 Nephi 2:25
[15] Quote Book, 243
[16] See Janet Peterson and LaRene Porter Gaunt, The Children's Friends: Primary Presidents and Their Lives of Service [1996], 174-75
[17] Thomas S. Monson, "The Race of Life," Ensign, May 2004
[18] Doctrine and Covenants 25:13
[19] I Timothy 6:12
[20] I Nephi 14:14; emphasis added
[21] Doctrine and Covenants 84:88