I am excited to be with you this wonderful afternoon. I am excited to be accompanied by my wonderful bride. When I was 17 years old, my family was returning from a mission in Minnesota, where my father and mother had presided. I returned about a month earlier than my parents, along with my younger sister. Some of you know how annoying a younger sister can be, and she was no exception.
My sister and I decided to attend the ward that our family would reside in upon their return. So, on the Sabbath, my sister and I joined the congregation in the old Kaysville Utah Tabernacle. In that building, you can enter in the front, by the stand where the speakers and presiding authorities sit. I was sitting toward the back of the congregation when the most beautiful creature I had ever seen entered the front of the chapel. I leaned over to my sister and said something like, "See that girl? I am going to go out with her someday."
To which my sister replied, "You? She is out of your league."
Well, 36 years after seeing her for the first time, she is still out of my league, but she is my eternal companion. In the fall of 2011, as a new mission president and wife, we were excited to be out among our missionaries. We decided to do apartment inspections and visit every pair of missionaries in the mission.
As we traveled from Guatemala City to one of our more remote zones, known as Sololá, we learned that a demonstration was blocking the road in front of us. Demonstrations in Guatemala can take hours, and there is usually no way to get past them. But when we began to inquire about a possible alternative road, we were told of another route. The route, however, came with the following warnings:
- It is not a great road, but adequate.
- Whatever you do, make sure that you are not on the road after dark.
- Bands of robbers are prevalent on that road after dark.
Like any zealous new mission president and wife, on we went. After driving a while, we came to a spot on a dirt road that looked like a very steep drop-off into a wash. My beautiful wife joked that we should get the camera out and take pictures as we went over the edge.
Now, years earlier I had been a young missionary in Guatemala and had learned that a small branch dragged across the road meant "proceed with caution." It might even mean "stop." I saw the branch but failed, at the time, to register what it meant.
In the next moment, we found ourselves dangling off a 20-foot ledge where a bridge had washed out. I managed to climb out my side, but my wife could not open her door. When she made a move to try and climb over the seat and come out my door, the vehicle began to rock. Obviously, it was a very concerning moment. Many thoughts ran through my mind. I could see the headlines: "New Mission President Drove over Embankment Where There Was No Bridge, Resulting in Severe Injury to Wife" or "New Mission President and Wife Missing; They Were Robbed on a Road on Which They Should Not Have Been Traveling."
Not knowing what to do, I paused outside the vehicle and pleaded with Heavenly Father, "Please help me in my moment of carelessness." Well, can you believe that a large banana truck suddenly pulled out onto the road from behind us? The driver and passengers saw us and came over to laugh and enjoy the predicament of the silly gringo. They pointed out the branch on the road. Literally, it was just a little twig.
Then, to our miraculous blessing, they retrieved from their truck the only chain that I saw in three years of service in Guatemala. They pulled us out and paused to take this picture.
Before they left, they cut down a tree and pulled it across the road. I think they wanted to make sure that the next gringo to come by did not make the same mistake.
At that point in time, we did what any other new mission president would do: We proceeded like nothing had happened. I am sure that a couple of the General Authorities to whom I reported will hear this talk and say, "What? We never heard about that."
Wonderful young people attending BYU-Idaho, I tell you this story to make the point that we must heed warnings, promptings, and direction given us by the voice of the Lord--no matter how strong or mild. That voice comes in many forms: scriptures, commandments, whisperings from the Holy Ghost, the words of the living prophets, parents (especially mothers), Church leaders, and good friends. Are we listening for and heeding these promptings and warnings? Why is it important to do so? We read in Proverbs:Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear the Lord, and depart from evil.[1] We must trust the Lord with all of our heart. We must understand that our knowledge falls short of what is best for us and best for others. If we do trust in Him, what a wonderful promise He bestows: He will direct our paths.
We have great examples of His willingness to direct our paths throughout the scriptures. Think for a moment of the wonderful example of Nephi. To start with, he and his brothers were given a commandment through their father to return to Jerusalem and obtain the brass plates.[2]
When leaning to their own understanding, they came up with the bright idea of casting lots and then sending someone to go up to the house of Laban to just ask for the plates of brass. We all know how well that went for Laman. In the end, not such a good idea.
Then the brothers deliberated on the problem and came up with a well-thought-out plan. With their exceedingly great possessions, they decided to try and buy the plates of brass. Now, by all worldly standards, that was a very good plan. Yet the results were no better than the previous attempt.[3]
After taking a beating from his brothers, seeing an angel, and having another disagreement, Nephi at last leaned not to his own understanding. He trusted in the Lord, saying, "And I was led by the Spirit, not knowing beforehand the things which I should do."[4]
In our family, we have a saying that became an important part of our mission, as my wife and I were privileged to lead the missionaries of the Guatemala Guatemala City Central Mission. Now, it is not original to us, because President Russell M. Nelson has been teaching the concept for a while. President Nelson said it this way:
"Obedience brings success; exact obedience brings miracles."[5]
Our family and mission version is "Obedience brings blessings, but exact obedience brings miracles."
One of the most enjoyable experiences that I have had is to hold a first interview with a new missionary. You returned missionaries remember that interview. You were scared to death. As a mission president, I cherished that moment because you were very moldable.
I would have the missionary sit down, and then I would pull my chair up close to the missionary so that my knees were almost touching his or her knees. Then I would look right in the missionary's eyes and say something like this: "Elder or Sister, there are many things that this mission may be struggling to understand and become, but there is one thing we do and will continue to do well." I would continue, "Obedience brings blessings, but exact obedience brings miracles, and in this mission we are not looking for blessings. Elder or Sister, will you help us have miracles?"
You know what, I never had a missionary say no. What a wonderful commitment! For the rest of their missions, we could always remind them that they had promised to help us have miracles, and we did have miracles.
I am sure that I do not completely understand what exact obedience means, but here is what I have come to understand. It is not perfect obedience; that is impossible. Hence, repentance must be a key part of exact obedience.
In the scriptures, we have great examples of exact obedience. In fact, one of the greatest stories is of a group of 2,060 young men who were exactly obedient. We learn of them: "Yea, and they did obey and observe to perform every word of command with exactness; yea, and even according to their faith it was done unto them; and I did remember the words which they said unto me that their mothers had taught them."[6]
As you recall, the stripling warriors were in a very precarious situation when Helaman recorded this scripture. They were in a battle in which the remaining part of the army was giving way. In other words, they were retreating!
To me, this means that initially the army resembled a line or arc in fighting the enemy, but as the rest of the army began giving way, the stripling warriors were forced to defend themselves, their line becoming the shape of a peninsula. They were forced to spread out in defense.
I imagine Helaman giving a command like "You, 200 young men, move to our left flank and force those Lamanites trying to cut us off from the remaining army to turn back." Again, I know they were not perfect, but they were exact. Imagine that in performing this task, they realized that they had gone to the left 100 yards too far. What did they do? Did they sit down and worry because they were not perfect? Did they give up because they had failed? Did they stop and deliberate together to determine what they should do next? No, they immediately corrected their action.
This mental picture has helped me come to understand that exact obedience means as I make a mistake or commit a sin, the speed at which I start the repentance process is important. I need to immediately repent. I must use the repentance process whether my mistakes are large or small. And I must respond immediately.
In the most recent general conference, Brother Stephen W. Owen stated, "True repentance inspires us to make our obedience a commitment--a covenant."[7] We need that inspiration! May we all commit to repent, drawing upon the sacrifice of the Savior with a more-frequent and quicker response.
Exact obedience also requires a commitment to all the warnings and promptings and commandments that Heavenly Father gives us. They come from many sources, as I mentioned earlier. With regard to these young men, one of the greatest sources of warnings and commandments was their righteous mothers.
President Gordon B. Hinckley, when speaking of the temptations and challenges that face young people of your age, stated, "I know of no better answer to these foul practices that confront our young people than the teachings of a mother, given in love with an unmistakable warning."[8]
Get accustomed to it, young people; righteous mothers will be giving you warnings for the rest of your life. Just before my father was sustained as a General Authority, in 1988, he was excited to tell his mother about the upcoming calling. Of course, he anticipated that she would be excited for the call and even, as the mother of a new General Authority, a little proud. Can you imagine my father's surprise when the first words out of her mouth were "Don't you dare embarrass the prophet!"
Sometimes we will be likewise surprised; we will not understand why Heavenly Father asks specific things from us. Those can be some of the toughest times to be exactly obedient. Remember the account of when Adam, one of the greatest of all, was asked why he gave sacrifice: "And after many days an angel of the Lord appeared unto Adam, saying: Why dost thou offer sacrifices unto the Lord? And Adam said unto him: I know not, save the Lord commanded me."[9]
My wife has been a wonderful example of exact obedience even when she has not understood. During the October 2000 general conference, my wife heard the counsel from President Gordon B. Hinckley that "we discourage tattoos and also 'the piercing of the body for other than medical purposes.' We do not, however, take any positon 'on the minimal piercing of the ears by women for one pair of earrings--one pair.'"[10] When my wife arrived home, our second daughter remembers her mom explaining to her the importance of following the prophets no matter what. As she talked, my wife also acted. She took out her second pair of earrings for the last time. I believe she still does not understand why, but I know that why does not matter to her.
To some of us, that may seem insignificant because it is such a small thing. That is true. However, I do not remember the Savior saying, "If ye love me, keep the commandments that appear important."
My dear brothers and sisters, there is one clear voice of warning that we must always heed. That voice comes from the Lord's chosen apostles and prophets. It might not be popular by the world's standards, just like that small thing requested by President Hinckley, but you can--no, you must--trust that it comes from Heavenly Father. It might be only a small twig or a whole tree that they are dragging across the road. I exhort you to read the conference that just occurred with the thought in mind of, What twigs did the Lord place in my path? To me, the reaffirmation of the family proclamation was absolutely needed and clearly placed in your and my path once again.
Now, some of you may be thinking, "Well, that is great. But what do you do when you are seeking promptings, counsel from the Lord, warnings, and direction, and you just do not seem to receive an answer?"
Maybe you are having this concern with regard to the most important decision you will make in your life. Remember the promise to trust in the Lord with all thine heart and He will direct thy paths.
On important events in our lives, we do want clear direction, and that may be hard to find. When I was courting my wonderful bride, I wanted a clear manifestation of the Spirit that she was the right one. It would have been nice to have an angel come down and declare that to me. What I knew for certain was that I was definitely in love. I could not stand to go more than about 18 hours without seeing her.
So I did all the things outlined: I fasted, I prayed, I attended the temple, and I sought the counsel of my parents. Now, before I continue, I want to add that I believe I was raised by the greatest father that has ever walked the face of the earth. However, he could not confirm that my wife was the right one for me. I had had such a great relationship with my father that I just assumed he would help me with that most important of decisions. But he could not tell me that he had had confirmation by the Spirit. My mother, thankfully, was more helpful. She expressed that she felt good about Emily. My mother's feelings allowed me to move forward to do what was right.
Logic also played a very valuable role in the process of making a decision. I knew that Emily possessed an unusually strong commitment to the gospel of Jesus Christ. What the Lord wanted was going to come first in her life--no matter what. She was extremely kind. She was intelligent, and as we spoke about scripture study, prayer, family home evening, Church service, and many other topics, it was evident that she was founded in true principles.
So, with those assurances, on a wonderful day in April 1985, my eternal companion and I started a never-ending journey. She is the single best decision that I have ever made. Heavenly Father was definitely directing my path. That does not mean that life has been simple and without challenges. But it has been a unique journey that we have shared together. I look forward to spending another 50 billion years with her! Maybe then she will not be a mystery to me. On second thought, it will be okay if she still is a bit of a mystery.
I have had such strong answers to many prayers, so why not an unmistakable answer to the most important of all requests that I had made to the Lord up to that point in my life? I believe it was to teach me to listen to the still, small voice and not doubt. Furthermore, I have come to understand that if I am repentant, being exactly obedient, following my leaders, and making other good choices--in other words, if I am worthy--Heavenly Father will not let me make big mistakes without proper warning. Nor will He let you.
In December 1996, my wife was close to the end of her pregnancy with our last child. It was a Sunday, and my bride requested that I give her a blessing. She was concerned with the well-being of our unborn child.
For some reason--and, brethren, do not make this mistake--I took her request lightly, thinking that she was just overreacting. She was so close to having the baby that everything was sure to be just fine. I predetermined what "I" was going to say in the blessing, instead of remembering that we need always to seek those warnings, promptings, and revelations that Heavenly Father wants us to pronounce when we have the privilege to exercise His priesthood. We never give a blessing. It comes from Him.
After visiting with family that Sabbath afternoon, we retired to our little apartment in Logan, Utah, and tucked our three children into bed. We then prepared for the blessing. I placed my hands upon her head and closed my eyes, and then the most incredible thing happened. I could not remember what I was doing. I opened my eyes and could see my beautiful bride sitting in the chair with her head bowed, waiting. I remembered that I was giving her a blessing and began once again. I placed my hands on her head and started over, when, to my surprise, the very same thing happened. I went completely blank. I could not remember what I was doing. I then sat down by my bride and said something like "You are right, my dear; something is wrong."
What I was experiencing can be described only with the Lord's words:
"But, behold, I say unto you, that you must study it out in your mind; then you must ask me if it be right, and if it is right I will cause that your bosom shall burn within you; therefore, you shall feel that it is right.
But if it be not right you shall have no such feelings, but you shall have a stupor of thought that shall cause you to forget the thing which is wrong."[11]
I have never experienced a stupor of thought even remotely as strong since that cold day in December 1996. Heavenly Father taught me in such a powerful way and prevented me from making a mistake from which I might not have been able to recover. After that experience, I have become much more sensitive to "if it be not right you shall have no such feelings."
The remaining portion of the story is sacred and does not apply to this subject today. Let me just conclude the story by saying that we immediately called my wife's doctor, who is a wonderful priesthood man. When we told him what had happened, he explained that he had felt anxious the last time she was in the office, but with no evidence as to why. Now he felt that we should leave immediately for the hospital, and he would be there to start labor as soon as we arrived. About 48 hours later, and after several very crucial moments, our beautiful youngest daughter was born.
My young friends, Heavenly Father is here to keep us from making very costly mistakes if we are seeking His warnings, promptings, and revelations from all available sources--and if we heed and act upon them. We have the right to have the Holy Ghost always be with us, especially in crucial moments of life.
Life is not a fairytale, but I believe that, as we end this life, everyone can experience the words "And they lived happily ever after." Let me explain.
To do so, let us look for a moment at the life of Job. His experience is absolute proof that life can be very difficult even when one is being exactly obedient. Often I have thought, "Why would the Lord require so much of one man who was so committed to doing what was right?"
Then one time when I was experiencing a little affliction, little especially when compared to that of Job or Joseph Smith. I read these words:
"My son, peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment;
And then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy foes.
Thy friends do stand by thee, and they shall hail thee again with warm hearts and friendly hands.
Thou art not yet as Job; thy friends do not contend against thee, neither charge thee with transgression, as they did Job."[12]
Maybe, just maybe, the Lord required so much of Job so that the Lord could teach you and me and Joseph Smith that we are not yet as Job. And giving us that perspective, He could remind us that if we endure our small affliction well, God shall exalt us.
Brothers and sisters, that you will successfully identify the warning twigs and trees that Heavenly Father places in your path is my hope for each and every one of you.
I testify that as we heed the voice of the Lord, as we receive it from its many sources and strive to be exactly obedient, we can have a life that ends with "And they lived happily ever after." That can happen only by living the doctrine of Christ and making and keeping sacred covenants. Of this I so testify in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
Notes
[1] Proverbs 3:5-7
[2] See 1 Nephi 3:4
[3] See 1 Nephi 3:25
[4] 1 Nephi 4:6
[5] Russell M. Nelson, in "Elder Nelson Delivers Spiritual Thanksgiving Feast to MTCs"; https://www.lds.org/church/news/elder-nelson-delivers-spiritual-thanksgiving-feast-to-mtcs?lang=eng
[6] Alma 57:21
[7] Stephen W. Owen, "Repentance Is Always Positive," Ensign, Nov. 2017
[8] Gordon B. Hinckley, "Your Greatest Challenge, Mother," Ensign, Nov. 2000
[9] Moses 5:6
[10] Gordon B. Hinckley, "Great Shall Be the Peace of Thy Children," Ensign, Nov. 2000
[11] Doctrine and Covenants 9:8-9
[12] Doctrine and Covenants 121:7-10