Preparing for this talk has seemed like one of the toughest things I have had to prepare in a long time. It has caused me to reflect and ponder on many things in my life. I am, indeed, grateful for this opportunity and for the many things I have learned about myself, this topic, and many other topics that I've explored during this process.
I pray the Holy Ghost will testify to you what you have come here to hear, and it will be delivered to you in a way that will be pleasing to our Heavenly Father. Throughout my address you will hear and be prompted with questions. I hope you will take the opportunity to seek for your own answers to those questions.
I have had a theme going on in my life throughout the past few years and the theme is potential and perspective. This theme has run through my life by interactions with my students, my family, and my calling in the Church. It is funny how the Lord works when he is trying to mold you into what you can become. He gives you opportunities, experiences, and challenges. It makes total sense why he sent us all here to receive a body and have experiences instead of just preaching to us from Heaven. By us being actively engaged and allowing us to observe others, we become empowered to learn for ourselves.
Three years ago my husband and I were called into the Stake Presidents office. I thought they wanted to talk to us about a position for my husband. To my surprise they asked me to be the Stake Young Women's President. Now, I have never been a president of any auxiliary before so I was pretty sure I looked behind me to see who else was in the room. There sat only me, my husband, and the Stake Presidency. I asked them first of all, are you sure? Then of course I cried out of fear and disbelief. Why would they be inspired by our Heavenly Father to call me? I felt I did not fit the mold or potential of someone to be called to this calling based on my perspective of others I had observed.
After I was set apart I was talking to one of my colleagues at work and I told her of the inadequacy I felt and how I had no idea how or why I would have been called to this calling. Still crying as I spoke to her about my concerns, my friend said to me, "I understand how you feel." She told me she had those same feelings when she was called to that same position. She said, "Euleza, let me tell you what helped me when I felt as you feel right now." It was something one of her stake presidents had said to her when she was called. He said, "Kris, you are not called because of who you are, but who you can become." I felt, as I heard those words, Kris was an angel that was trying to give me a message from my Heavenly Father. Those words may have been for Kris at the time she heard them, but they were for me right now. Her knowledge and understanding of what and how I was feeling was valid to me because I knew she had a similar experience and she had lived through some of my same concerns. She had walked in my shoes.
We are here to help ourselves and others make it home. I am thankful for all the people on this earth and on the other side of the veil that has helped me not give up. They are the ones that when I asked for help instead of giving me a pity party would cheer me on. On one occasion I was going through a tough time. To this day I cannot even remember what that challenge was but I have never forgot her words to me. She said, "Euleza, I see you looking at yourself from what may seem to you to be a deep, deep hole. As you stand there at the bottom of that hole I see your hand reaching up. You want so badly to be pulled up to where you know you need to be; where you can feel safety and peace. But I also see you at the top of that deep hole, Euleza. You are reaching down to grab your own hand and pull yourself up." Then my friend added, "Grab on Euleza. Grab on and pull yourself up. You know where you want to be, and where you should be, you know it! Let yourself be rescued."
In Ether 12:27 we read:
"And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them."
One of the challenges I have been blessed with (ah, perspective) are chronic migraines. One morning I woke up with one and I knew that day I had to go to work, because I had signed up for a workshop in which tithing funds had been used for me to attend. So I took some medicine, said a prayer, and went. That day we learned about strengths and how we all have been anointed with strengths by our Heavenly Father. We learned that those strengths we have are unique to us. When we use our strengths for good, we can be better used as a tool by which we were designed.
Perceptions of others in my eyes were also changed. One of the things that had the biggest impact on me that day was when she talked to us about toxic conversations. She taught us that when we are frustrated with someone it's because they have strengths that are not connecting with our strength. When this happens we need to stop and look out (see it through their lens), and then look up. Turn to your Heavenly Father realizing that those same strengths that seem to be frustrating us are the same strengths that our Heavenly Father possesses. Perspective.
Now, can we see them and the conversation in a different way? When we look at those experiences in that way can we put our own perceptions away and listen, observe, and learn from them? Can we just try to see them through our Heavenly Fathers eyes?
In D&C 3:3-4 it says,
"Remember, remember that it is not the work of God that is frustrated, but the work of men;
"For although a man may have many revelations, and have power to do many mighty works, yet if he boasts in his own strength, and sets at naught the counsels of God, and follows after the dictates of his own will and carnal desires, he must fall and incur the vengeance of a just God upon him."
When I think of what I could have missed that day if I would have let my challenge get in my way. I would be different, even this talk written today would be different. That day I gained knowledge, understanding, and learning through my observations and being actively engaged. I have been able to use those things I learned in just that one day in all areas of my life.
Heavenly Father has sent us all here to be His tools and His hands. It is up to us to do our part to be allowed to be molded to become and reach our full potential. Sometimes our part is just having the courage to say or do something when moved upon by the Spirit without knowing why. By having trust in the Lord and the Holy Ghost, knowing there is a greater plan (and that His plan is a better one) we can help others succeed and get closer to our Heavenly Father's eternal perspective and our potential. That day my life was molded in a way I was not expecting and with that touch in my life I have been able to take what I learned to help others see maybe what they had not seen before.
We also read in Isaiah 64:8,
"But now, O Lord, thou art our father; we are the clay, and thou our potter; and we all are the work of thy hand."
The next few pictures are of three girls in my stake taking us through a process of making a personalized vase out of clay. I asked them to do this for something we would be using later that year in our Stake Young Women in Excellence. As we will notice they are all going through the same process and each vase, depending on their decisions, or maybe even challenges, will each turn out different and beautiful.
This first picture is of them holding dirt that has many imperfections and is not ready to be pliable. I love how one girl is holding the dirt and the others are helping lift from underneath. Has there been a time in your life where you felt helping hands beneath you lifting you up either from a complete stranger or someone you know? The three of them are about to tackle a journey together, which this picture may depict them saying to each other, "We can do this together". Can you imagine us saying that in heaven to each other before we left His presence? I can.
Here is the block of clay. It is now ready and willing to be put in the hands of the girls, and now it is up to the girls to create their masterpiece. The girls have worked with clay before. I know this because I have personally seen a couple of the girl's projects. They took a class, gained knowledge about the process, and learned through observing others and by practicing.
In order for us to meet our full potential, we are expected to gain knowledge, observe, and learn. We do this from gaining knowledge from the scriptures, our prophets, attending church, observing others, obeying and keeping our covenants, and by asking questions and seeking to understand.
We read in Proverbs 9:9-10:
"Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be yet wiser: teach a just man, and he will increase in learning.
"The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom: and the knowledge of the holy is understanding."
I could read a book on how to sculpt a vase out of clay, but until I really tried it and went through the process could I truly say I understand. Elder Bednar said in his book, Increase in Learning, the following, quote:
"Many facts are helpful or merely interesting to know. Some knowledge is useful to lean and apply. But gospel truths are essential for us to know and understand and live if we are to become what our Heavenly Father yearns us to become."
We also read in D & C 88:118
"...Teach one another words of wisdom; yea, seek ye out of the best books words of wisdom; seek learning, even by study and also by faith."
As we know the Lord's hands are in all things. I have seen it personally in my life and I am sure you have seen it in yours, too. If I may, I would like to compare some realizations I made with the process of the vases and our potential and perspective or perceptions we may have had in our own lives. Even though each girl was given the same instruction each girl took on the assignment in a different manner. Using their own perspective from their past experiences, knowledge and observations all began to form the clay how they felt was best and may have even seen the finished product in their mind before they began. Each had to make choices about what tool to use, how to use it, and when to use it. Each had to decide how much pressure if any, was needed. I imagine that there were times they asked each other for help, knowing that the other person may have some insight about how to create a handle or how to make a pattern on the vase.
Putting things into eternal perspective, aren't we all faced with challenges and trials? We all need each other.
I have a friend that was struggling with something very near and dear to her heart. I had no way of knowing how or what to say to her. I had been praying for her and I wanted her to find the peace that was there for her to feel, but I really had no way of knowing (really knowing) or understanding how she felt. I finally had words impressed upon my mind of what I needed to tell my friend. These words, although I believe were meant for her, they may also be meant for someone hearing this talk today. Here are the words I said to my friend:
"I want you to know that you will get through this journey. I want you to know that I am not sure how long it will take but [you will get through it]. I also want you to know that this journey you are on, is not for you. What I mean is that this journey you are on, is for you to help someone else that will be facing something similar. I am not sure when that will be, but this person will approach you and tell you their story. You will recognize it as your own. Then you will be able to tell them, 'I know how you feel, I not only know how you feel, I understand how you feel because I have walked in your shoes.' You will be the one that was sent to their aid to help them get through their journey because you have made it through yours."
Perspective.
We have been given a choice to make a difference and to prove ourselves. What we choose to do with the decisions or experiences we have is up to us. We have the strength within us and through the Holy Ghost to choose a better path.
With each picture you can see a little piece of the girls personalities are coming to life. As they all molded the piece of clay in different ways. They softened parts, rolled other parts, pulled and carved. One created a handle for her vase, they each could see potential and purpose in their own unique vase. All vases took time and effort on their part. They spent many hours and days through months of preparation. The time away from the shop I am sure their creation was on their mind. What step they should take next?
Finally it was time to put their creation in the hot fire to help refine any imperfections and to make the vases stronger.
I relate this to us after we have been through a challenge—whether we made choices that took us there or whether we were blessed with a trial to make us stronger. Whichever the case may be, we now are a stronger vessel for walking through the experience.
In 2 Nephi 31:20 it reads:
"Wherefore, ye must press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have eternal life."
The girls then put the finishing touches on the vases by painting them white and then a last coat of glaze to make them shine. They all knew the plan, the deadline, the purpose, and what was expected of them. When I met them about nine months later to pick up the vases, their humbleness was evident. As the girls looked at me looking at their creations you could feel their vulnerability. As I picked up each one and examined it, I was in awe! I had always wanted to be talented in this craft but haven't spent the hours of learning and perfecting as they have. They were adorable trying to take credit for someone else's work as they picked up a vase they had not created. As I examined each vase I could not see one mistake—only beauty.
I could see the light in their eyes as they humbly posed for a picture with their own masterpiece. There was something about their unity they had discovered as they had worked on this process and journey together.
As we all know we are not only relying on ourselves and others, but on our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. He will never leave us. Jesus has walked in our shoes. He knows everything that we are, or will go through and He completely understands. He is there to help us. We need to do our part by actively living the gospel so we can trust and feel His love and His hands in all things. I have witnessed myself being pulled up from that deep, deep hole and then realizing and feeling the comfort that comes from His almighty hand that reassures me and again I know I am not alone.
Can I ask all of you to take a look at this picture for a moment? Take a few seconds to get the image in your mind. Now while looking at this picture can you envision a scene I will describe to you. You are coming into the presence of our Heavenly Father. You see Jesus there with open arms. As you walk closer to Jesus you notice and feel the presence of all the others standing around you. You feel as if you may not know the angels around you, but there seems to be something familiar about them. Then you realize you are feeling something special from them. Something that you know you have felt before. You realize it is love you are feeling from them. Unconditional love. You feel as if they are looking at you in, awe. You feel so much love as you continue to walk to Jesus that you almost cannot contain yourself. You feel as if the people around you are looking at you without judgment and with so much appreciation for things you may have done in their life or in the life of one of their loved ones here on earth. You just do not want this feeling to go away because it is so inviting to your soul and you are so happy.
Now in this same picture imagine the scene a little different. This time you are the angels in this picture in the crowd looking on to someone coming into the presence of our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. You are the one in awe, without judgment, and you feel so much appreciation for that person and the part they have played in either your life when you were here on earth, or in the life of one of your loved ones when they were on this earth. This is the eternal perspective.
How can we play and be a part of that familiar setting we just felt? Could we do this by seeing the potential in others through our perceptions and perspective? Now, I know all these words came to my mind to say today because my Heavenly Father has blessed me with the strength and experiences to learn what I personally need to work on. In fact, I was driving into work early one morning as I was having all these thoughts about looking at others through Heavenly Fathers eyes and not judging others, when I was given an opportunity to do just that. I came up on a four-way stop where three cars were waiting their turn. As each took their turn there was one driver just sitting there and not taking his turn or looking up. He just sat there. As it appeared to me he may have been looking at his phone. It was past his turn to go but he was not moving. So I started to pull forward to make eye contact. "Hmm..." I thought. "I wonder if everything is okay."
I started driving through the intersection and then stopped in front of his car. He looked up and I mouthed, "Are you okay?" He seemed annoyed, by my perception, for his reaction was with his hand and he mouthed to me, "Just drive through". The next thought into my head was "Really? That is not a parking lot. That is a stop sign."
"Oops," I immediately said to myself. That is not looking at him in an eternal perspective. Maybe he is lost. Maybe he just felt the need to say a silent prayer. Give him the benefit of the doubt. So you see I am the one that needs to work on this whole concept the most, but I am thankful I have the opportunities to try and try again.
Perhaps this talk was mostly written because of the things I needed to be reminded of and what better way than to be asked to search, ponder, and pray and teach something that you need the most. I hope that we all can learn something from the things shared today, and look at others and ourselves in an eternal perspective—to see ourselves, neighbors, friends, family members, and strangers the way our Heavenly Fathers sees them. Practice right now, knowing and believing that everything I need to go through has a purpose and is carving my life into something beautiful, if I allow those opportunities to become a better person. Showing our Heavenly Father that through our challenges or trails we will be faced with can be looked through the eternal perspective lens. And that we can look at them as ways we can strengthen ourselves and others.
Heavenly Father makes no mistakes but we do and because of that He sent His Only Begotten Son to die for our mistakes, and to make us stronger in the process. As we strive to become everything our Heavenly Father sees and believes that we can become we will be happier and feel His love more abundantly. We will know that Jesus is the Christ; that we are sons and daughters of a living God. We can make a difference in this life, and we will make it to see his glorified body. I believe this with all my heart, might, mind and soul in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.