In Genesis 3:9 Adam is asked, “Where art thou?” [1] Of course, Heavenly Father knew where Adam was. Perhaps it is a rhetorical question asking Adam to take a moment to consider where he was in relation to where he could be, and perhaps even should be.
We have been admonished to liken all scripture to ourselves, [2] and therefore we should be asking, Where Am I? And not only Where am I? but also Why am I here? Basic answers to the question Why am I here? as outlined by President Ezra Taft Benson [3] include:
- to gain a body,
- to gain knowledge of good and evil through obedience and experience,
- to prove ourselves, and
- to live in families and raise children.
As you ponder these truths of why you are on earth, you might feel to ask, “Yes, I know I am here to gain a body, but why am I here?”—with an emphasis on the here. Furthermore, you might continue to question, “Why am I here in Rexburg, Idaho?” or “Why I am I here in a family blessed with means to help others?” or “Why am I here with a life-threatening illness?” Let me assure you, it is no surprise to Heavenly Father that you are here at this time and in your particular circumstance. With these questions in mind, some students have come to my office sharing feelings which include the following:
- “I am not on the perfect track for graduation.”
- “All my friends have already graduated.”
- “I started school later in life, and therefore I am ‘behind’ everyone else.”
Likewise, many times in life your counsel with the Lord might include thoughts such as:
- “I am not on the perfect track at this point in my life. What can I do to get back on track?”
- “All my friends seem to have wandered from the truth. How do I continue to be a good example? Where do I find my support now?”
- “I have found my firm foundation in the gospel, but what now?”
These are great questions. Might I also suggest additional questions which can help move you from an I-and-me concern toward a concern for others. You might ask:
- Who has the Lord put me here to bless?
- Who is in my sphere of influence who could use my help?
- Who has the Lord put in my path to help answer his or her prayers? [4]
You must come to know that you are here, just as Esther was, for such a time as this: a time of tumult in a world which needs those who rely on the steadying influence of their Heavenly Father and of His gospel and its truth. [5] You were put here to be tried and tested in specific, significant ways which would offer the best opportunities for refining your individual soul. Indeed, without your mortal experience, you could not become like your Heavenly Father. [6] And Heavenly Father knows best how to “come off conqueror” [7] in the mortal experience. [8] He has given to you the gospel as a guide. [9] He has not left you comfortless. [10] Instead, as you pass through your “fiery trial[s]” [11] in this “dark and dreary waste,” [12] the Lord has promised that He will be your “light in the wilderness.” [13] His work is to help you through your wilderness [14] as you move from your earthly land of inheritance to an eternal land of promise, [15] beyond this “vale of sorrow into a far better land of promise.” [16] Indeed “he is the mediator of a better covenant, which was established upon better promises.” [17] And because of these “better promises,” your life can be full of joy as you seek gladness in using the agency granted to you. Choose to be softened, not embittered. [18] Choose to stand fast [19] and, as did Nephi, not to give place to the enemy of your soul. [20] Choose to see Him rather than be overcome in the winds and storms. [21] Isn’t that what Peter did when he, although briefly, walked on water? [22] Choose to “hold fast.” [23]
Now as you move through your various journeys, I encourage you:
1) to find the gladness and peace that comes from living with faith,
2) to receive a testimony of the divinity of family, and
3) to receive and give forgiveness without restraint or compulsory means.
I appreciated reading the comments shared on the devotional discussion board. Katie Rogers shared how she has learned by faith to overcome discouragement through forgiveness and gratitude. Sharee Osborne has faith in a brighter future by learning from her ancestral past. Debbie Flagg has found that by forgiving others “you are not carrying around [a] heavy load of ang[er] and hostility.” And Freddy, an online student from Ghana, testified family and family history are indeed essential to the plan of salvation.
My life, with its normal ups and downs, has been richly blessed with opportunities to gain deeper understanding through experiences related to these three topics: faith, family, and forgiveness. Some experiences have been trying. Some have been exhilarating. Some have been daunting, and some even terrifying. I am learning how to see these as hallowing, not harrowing, experiences. In doing so, I ask myself:
- How does this experience answer the question Why Am I Here?
- Is there a different way to get through this and find gladness at the end?
- What do I need to do or see differently?
- Am I looking with an eye of faith or an eye of doubt?
- In the process of purposeful hallowing, how can I get to a place of gladness and calm assurance that He cares?
- How do the tools of faith, family, and forgiveness help me to get to that place of gladness which results from hallowing?
Faith
First, let’s consider faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and how choosing to see and act in faith can lead to gladness. We can have faith in many things. But it is faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and His Atonement, [24] which is the foundation of all gladness we can experience, both in this mortal life and for eternity.
Indeed, it took faith in Christ for the Brother of Jared to put openings in the boats he was commanded to build, and then to trust those boats would get them where they needed to be. [25] It took faith in Christ for Nephites who came to a promised land to cast in all of their seeds, [26] not holding anything back. It took faith in Christ for a young man to offer up his loaves and fishes in order that Christ could bless and then feed a hungry multitude. [27] It took faith in Christ for Amulek to carry on even though his “father and his kindred” turned away from God. [28] It took faith in Christ for the Widow of Zarephath to trust Elijah and use her last drop of oil and last bits of grain to feed a prophet and not her son. [29]
And what happened as a result of their faith? The Brother of Jared was led to a promised land and the boats did not sink. [30] The Nephites were blessed with a crop. [31] The multitude was fed. [32] Amulek continued faithful, despite his trials. The Widow of Zarephath’s food did not fail. [33] How could they act in faith even as the odds seemed stacked against them? Because they knew in whom they had trusted. Perhaps they had already experienced previous moments of faith in Christ, and so trusted yet again in His promise that He would bring them “unto their desired haven.” [34]
What does acting in faith look like? It looks like moving forward without seeing the end, by knowing in whom you have trusted. It is making a decision, taking it to the Lord for a confirming witness, and then moving forward, sometimes into the darkness, while holding on to a witness received from the Holy Ghost—a witness that the path you are on is the right path for you at this time. Last week, Brother Spencer Allen shared how he and his wife acted in faith in their job search and came to the knowledge that faith not only requires action but also waiting upon the Lord’s timing.
In Alma 32:21 we read:
And now as I said concerning faith—faith is not to have a perfect knowledge of things; therefore if ye have faith ye hope for things which are not seen, which are true. [35]
What things do you not see, which are true? For me, one thing is the promise of my own family—a husband and children sealed to me as an eternal family unit—a promise to me that I will be a mother in Zion and raise my children in righteousness. But how is this to happen? I have yet to have a husband. I will never have my own biological children on this earth. So, how is this promise to be fulfilled? I do not know. What I do know is that it has been promised me and all God’s promises shall be fulfilled. [36]
So, what do I do in the meantime? I keep my covenants. I have faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and His Atonement, which makes all things possible. [37] I act as if I already have a husband to whom I am bound in a covenant, eternal relationship. He is as real as I am. And though I may not know him now, I will one day know him; therefore, I stay faithful to our eternal companionship. I also strive to act as if my children know me, are aware of me, and are supporting me as I fulfill those things that I have vowed to do. [38] I will be true to them now, because one day they may ask me, “Mom, how did you do it? How did you stay faithful through the final days? What carried you through, Mom?” And one day my children may say of me, “We do not doubt our [mother] knew it.” [39] When we are together as an eternal family unit, what a day of gladness that will be! In the meantime, I find comfort in 2 Nephi 8:3, which I have likened to myself:
For the Lord shall comfort [Amy]; he will comfort all her waste places; and he will make her wilderness like Eden, and her desert like the garden of the Lord. Joy and gladness shall be found therein, thanksgiving and the voice of melody. [40]
Family
Second, let us consider family and how families can lead us to gladness. Families are a divine institution and are “central to the Creator’s plan.” [41] As we know, our families exist on both sides of the veil. Elder Dale G. Renlund taught that as we participate in family history work, we will see “increased family blessings, no matter our current, past, or future family situation or how imperfect our family tree may be.” Elder Renlund also taught that “when ordinances are performed on behalf of the deceased, God’s children on earth are healed.” [42] He then reminded us that President Russell M. Nelson declared:
Your worship in the temple and your service there for your ancestors will bless you with increased personal revelation and peace and will fortify your commitment to stay on the covenant path. [43]
President Nelson has also invited “all of God’s children on both sides of the veil to come unto their Savior, receive the blessings of the holy temple, have enduring joy, and qualify for eternal life.” [44] As these members of our family come to a sure knowledge of the truthfulness of the gospel, they will need to be freed from the bonds of spirit prison. Thus, we should be actively involved in redeeming our kindred dead by serving as a proxy for them in holy temples of the Lord. Upon being freed, they can, perhaps, be sent to help us. Elder Jeffrey R. Holland encouraged us to “ask for angels to help [us].” [45] Additionally, Joseph F. Smith taught:
When messengers are sent to minister to the inhabitants of this earth, they are not strangers, but from the ranks of our kindred [and] friends . . . . In like manner our fathers and mothers, brothers, sisters, and friends who have passed away from this earth, having been faithful, and worthy to enjoy these rights and privileges, may have a mission given them to visit their relatives and friends upon the earth again, bringing from the divine Presence messages of love, of warning, or reproof and instruction, to those whom they had learned to love in the flesh. [46]
Family history becomes an opportunity not only to rescue your family but also an opportunity for you to come to know those who might be sent to your rescue. I know from personal experience that just as the Lord sent the members from Utah to rescue those on the plains stranded in winter storms, so He has those on both sides of the veil prepared to help rescue us. [47] Additionally, temple work helps free others whose posterity lives in other countries. Perhaps the Lord can send them to help their posterity to such locations where we cannot go.
As you research your ancestors you might learn how they dealt with the trials of their day. Their words of encouragement can sustain you in times of fear and doubt. Two of my ancestors have sent me messages of faith which have encouraged me. First, from Sarah Elizabeth McDonald Baskin Patterson. Sarah was born in 1809 and died sometime after 1871. She is my first cousin, five times removed. Among the letters we have from my McBryde ancestors in Alabama, we have a letter written by her. On September 11, 1870, she writes:
I have been a poor unprofitable servant in the service of my master, yet that service has been my comforter all my life. Whenever troubles innumberable assailed me I could just open my Bible and find something adapted to my case showing me that my troubles were nothing more than the common lot of man and I can truly say today that every trial and temptation through which I have passed has been profitable to me. [48]
Additionally, in FamilySearch I came across the history of my sixth-great-grandfather, Captain David Perry, who, before he died, prepared his autobiography for publication in 1822. In it, he reflects on his experiences during the Revolutionary War and gives his posterity an admonition. He requests that we, his posterity, remember that “the Lord stood by us and put our enemies to flight in a marvelous manner, and wrought wonders for us as a nation: and we have the greatest reason to bless and praise his holy name, of any people on the earth.” [49] He also testified that “the Lord discomfited [the enemy], . . . so that we may see, that the effectual, fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.” [50] And finally, Captain Perry testified that “had not the Lord been on our side, and fought our battles, we must have failed to maintain our liberties against so potent a foe.” [51]
These testimonies from my ancestors sustain me today. I am certain they never imagined that their cousin or granddaughter in 2018 would find comfort in their words from so long ago. However, the Lord knew I would need to hear their testimony. He inspired them to write so I could gain comfort from their testimonies and find gladness in my journey. I encourage you to consider what your posterity might need to hear and then record it for them.
To help you see how family history can be immediately relevant for you, I invite you to now take out your electronic device, open your FamilyTree app, and select the option to see Relatives Near Me in the menu. You will need to ensure that you allow your device to know your location. Let’s take a moment and see how many of you have relatives in today’s audience in the Manwaring Center Ballroom.
By a raise of hands, how many of you have relatives here today? That is wonderful! I, too, have had the joy of discovering relatives using this app. Suzie Upchurch, Kindra Bingham, and I all attended the Willowbrook Ward. One Sunday we decided to see if we were related. We discovered we are each connected to the other and we now affectionately call each other ‘cuz! Since this time, Suzie and Kindra have moved from Rexburg, but we are still in contact and find support and gladness in our friendship. I encourage you to use this app to find more family who can also be called friends, which will thus increase your gladness.
Forgiveness
Finally, let us consider forgiveness and how its attendant consequences can lead to gladness. We learn in Doctrine and Covenants 64:10 that we are required to forgive all men. This may be easy in theory but difficult in practice. C. S. Lewis stated, “Everyone says forgiveness is a lovely idea, until they have something to forgive.” [52] Elder Richard G. Scott has taught:
Forgiveness heals terrible, tragic wounds, for it allows the love of God to purge your heart and mind of the poison of hate. It cleanses your consciousness of the desire for revenge. It makes place for the purifying, healing, restoring love of the Lord. [53]
In my life I have had opportunity to forgive and also to ask for forgiveness. What I have learned is when we are in a state of exacting justice, we cannot be glad. Many years ago an injustice occurred in my life. After time and counseling with my bishop as well as professional counselors, I made the decision that I must let this be set aside and I must continue with my life. Many years later, forgiveness came in an unexpected way. As I reflect on it now, it is nice to know that I didn’t spend years feeling hateful and angry. Instead, I was able to accomplish good things without constantly reflecting on the injustice.
Elder Jörg Klebingat admonished us that we need to:
Become really, really good at forgiving. . . . Forgive everyone, everything, all the time, or at least strive to do so, thus allowing forgiveness into your own life. Don’t hold grudges, don’t be easily offended, forgive and forget quickly, and don’t ever think that you are exempt from this commandment. Spiritual confidence increases when you know that the Lord knows that you bear no ill feelings toward another soul. [54]
I have also had the opportunity to directly ask for forgiveness from one whom I had wronged. Not until I asked this person directly for forgiveness did my feelings of anguish, of letting my Heavenly Father down, of not holding fast to my covenants and being a worthy representative of Christ, finally resolve into gratefulness for a Savior who continually calls to us to live a higher, holier way. Indeed, I felt as Alma described in Alma 36:20-21:
And oh, what joy, and what marvelous light I did behold; yea, my soul was filled with joy as exceeding as was my pain!
Yea, I say unto you, my son, that there could be nothing so exquisite and so bitter as were my pains. Yea, and again I say unto you, my son, that on the other hand, there can be nothing so exquisite and sweet as was my joy. [55]
I know that my life has been filled with more gladness because I have chosen to forgive and to ask for forgiveness. James E. Faust confirmed this when he taught:
If we can find forgiveness in our hearts for those who have caused us hurt and injury, we will rise to a higher level of self-esteem and well-being. . . . [P]eople who are taught to forgive become “less angry, more hopeful, less depressed, less anxious and less stressed,” [and find] “that forgiveness . . . is a liberating gift [that] people can give to themselves.” [56]
Conclusion
May you learn to lay your burden at His feet and, in faith, bear a song away. [57] As you choose this day whom you will serve, [58] you will discover why you are here at this particular time. By committing to be on the Lord’s side [59] and, although our numbers may be few, [60] you will come to know in whom you have trusted. [61] May you seek to scatter sunshine all along your way [62] as you learn to freely forgive. [63] May you believe all things, may you hope all things, and may you endure all things [64] so that you may come off conqueror. [65] By knowing in whom you have trusted, you shall be like Him, [66] and then you will be glad.
Psalm 107:23-30:
23 They that go down to the sea in ships, that do business in great waters;
24 These see the works of the Lord, and his wonders in the deep.
25 For he commandeth, and raiseth the stormy wind, which lifteth up the waves thereof.
26 They mount up to the heaven, they go down again to the depths: their soul is melted because of trouble.
27 They reel to and fro, and stagger like a drunken man, and are at their wits’ end.
28 Then they cry unto the Lord in their trouble, and he bringeth them out of their distresses.
29 He maketh the storm a calm, so that the waves thereof are still.
30 Then are they glad because they be quiet; so he bringeth them unto their desired haven. [67]
I know Heavenly Father, Jesus Christ and the Holy Ghost are real. I know Russell M. Nelson is the prophet of God on the earth today. I know my family, those on both sides of the veil, love me and are my greatest fans. I know that as I forgive and seek forgiveness, I will find gladness. I know that as I live a life of faith and keep my covenants, all blessings my Heavenly Father has to bestow on me, whether on this earth or in the eternities, will be mine. Of these truths I testify, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
Suggested Additional Readings
Ashton, Marvin J., A Voice of Gladness, April 1991 General Conference of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
Ashton, Marvin J., Be A Quality Person, Ensign, February 1993,
Bergin, Allen E., Psychology and Repentance, October 4, 1994, BYU Speeches
Call, Benjamin F., Choosing to Forgive, Ensign, January 2014
Cardon, Craig A., I Could Remember My Pains No More, Ensign, June 1992
Clark, Kim B., Identity and Purpose in God’s Eternal Plan, April 22, 2014, BYU-Idaho Devotional
Fuhriman, Addie, Singleness: How Relief Society Can Help, October 1980 General Conference of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
Higbee, Kenneth L., Forgetting Those Things Which Are Behind, Ensign, September 1972
Nelson, Russell M ., Now Is the Time to Prepare, April 2005 General Conference of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
Ogles, Benjamin M., Agency, Accountability, and the Atonement of Jesus Christ: Application to Sexual Assault, January 30, 2018, BYU Speeches
Rasband, James R ., Faith to Forgive Grievous Harms: Accepting the Atonement as Restitution, October 23, 2012, BYU Speeches
Scott, Richard G., Using the Supernal Gift of Prayer, April 2007 General Conference of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
Scott, Richard G., Obtaining Help from the Lord, October 1991 General Conference of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
Notes
[1] Genesis 3:19.
[2] 1 Nephi 19:23.
[3] The Teachings of Ezra Taft Benson, 1988, 27-28.
[4] Neal A. Maxwell, “Brim with Joy,” BYU devotional, Jan. 23, 1996; speeches.byu.edu/talks/neal-a-maxwell_brim-joy/.
[5] Esther 4:14.
[6] Abraham 3:25-26; Genesis 3:22; Alma 12:24; Alma 42:4.
[7] Doctrine and Covenants 10:5; see also Romans 8:37; Jacob 7:25; 2 Nephi 32:9.
[8] 2 Nephi 2:21.
[9] 2 Nephi 32:3, 5; Proverbs 3:6; 4:7; Doctrine and Covenants 46:7; Moroni 10:5; James 1:5.
[10] John 14:18.
[11] 1 Peter 4:12; “How Firm a Foundation,” Hymns, no. 85.
[12] 1 Nephi 8:7.
[13] 1 Nephi 17:13.
[14] Moses 1:39.
[15] Ether 2:7-9.
[16] Alma 37:45.
[17] Hebrews 8:6-7.
[18] Alma 62:41.
[19] 1 Corinthians 16:13; Alma 1:25; Philippians 4:1; Galatians 5:1; Alma 58:40; 1 Thessalonians 3:8; Alma 45:17; Philippians 1:27.
[20] 2 Nephi 4:28; Ephesians 4:27.
[21] 1 Nephi 18:21; Helaman 5:12; Ether 2:24-25.
[22] Matthew 14:28-31.
[23] Revelation 2:25; 3:3; see also Job 27:6; Hebrews 3:6; 10:23; 1 Nephi 8:30; 15:24.
[24] Moroni 7:41, Mosiah 4:6.
[25] Ether 2:20.
[26] 1 Nephi 18:24.
[27] John 6:9.
[28] Alma 15:16.
[29] 1 Kings 17:12.
[30] Ether 6:12.
[31] 1 Nephi 18:24.
[32] John 6:11-14.
[33] 1 Kings 17:12-15.
[34] Psalm 107:30.
[35] Alma 32:21.
[36] Alma 37:17; Doctrine and Covenants 1:37; 45:35; 98:3; Mormon 8:22.
[37] Luke 1:37.
[38] Jonah 2:9; Ecclesiastes 5:4.
[39] Alma 56:48.
[40] 2 Nephi 8:3.
[41] “The Family: A Proclamation to the World,” Ensign, Nov. 2010, 129.
[42] Dale G. Renlund, “Family History and Temple Work: Sealing and Healing,” Ensign, May 2018.
[43] Russell M. Nelson, “As We Go Forward Together,” Ensign, Apr. 2018.
[44] Russell M. Nelson, “Let Us All Press On,” Ensign, May 2018.
[45] Jeffrey R. Holland, “Place No More for the Enemy of My Soul,” Ensign, May 2010.
[46] Joseph F. Smith, Gospel Doctrine, 2002, page 435.
[47] “Come, Come, Ye Saints,” Mormon Tabernacle Choir; youtube.com/watch?v=4ia3gYSvG8M.
[48] Transcript of letter in possession of Amy Lucille Staiger.
[49] Recollections of a Soldier: The Life of Captain David Perry, page 52. For the full text of the book, please go to https://archive.org/details/recollectionsofo00perr.
[50] Recollections of a Soldier: The Life of Captain David Perry, page 53. For the full text of the book, please go to https://archive.org/details/recollectionsofo00perr.
[51] Ibid.
[52] C. S. Lewis, Mere Christianity.
[53] Richard G. Scott, “Healing the Tragic Scars of Abuse”, Ensign, May 1992.
[54] Jörg Klebingat, “Approaching the Throne of God with Confidence,” Ensign, Oct. 2014.
[55] Alma 36:20-21.
[56] James E. Faust, “The Healing Power of Forgiveness,” Ensign, May 2007.
[57] “How Gentle God’s Commands,” Hymns, no. 125.
[58] Joshua 24:15.
[59] “Who’s on the Lord’s Side?,” Hymns, no. 260.
[60] “Let Us All Press On,” Hymns, no. 243.
[61] 2 Nephi 4:19.
[62] “Scatter Sunshine,” Hymns, no. 230.
[63] “Help Me, Dear Father,” Children’s Songbook, no. 99.
[64] Articles of Faith 1:13.
[65] Doctrine and Covenants 10:5; 76:53.
[66] 1 John 3:2.
[67] Psalm 107:23-30; emphasis added.