REXBURG—Jane Clayson Johnson never expected to struggle with her mental health. She had worked for major news outlets as a reporter and anchor before taking a step back to live her dream of being a wife and mother. Soon after having her second child, she went from what she calls “situational sadness” to a deep clinical depression. It came as a surprise to her.
“It felt like someone had thrown me into a dark cave and sealed the entrance,” Johnson said in her devotional talk at BYU-Idaho. “And no matter how hard I tried, I could not find my way out.”
Johnson did find a way out through the help of her husband, medical professionals and her faith. She also began to talk about her experience with others. That led her to begin interviewing fellow members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints about their struggles with mental illness. Those 150 interviews turned into the book “Silent Souls Weeping.”
In those interviews, she said, three themes emerged: “the crushing weight of stigma, the danger of toxic perfectionism and how mental health challenges can affect our ability to feel the Spirit.”
Stigma
Johnson said BYU-Idaho President Alvin F. Meredith III invited her to talk about mental health in this devotional.
“A mental health challenge is not the result of personal inadequacy,” Johnson said. “It is not a reflection of your character. When we begin to see mental health challenges as burdens of mortal life, not moral failings, our perspective shifts.”
She shared four steps toward hope and healing with the devotional audience: be mindful, reframe your conversations, share your story and trust the Lord.
Being mindful includes emotional and spiritual signs that something isn’t right. She encourages students to take care of themselves. Make sure to eat healthy foods, exercise and get enough sleep.
Reframing your conversations can begin with talking about “brain health” instead of “mental health.”
“We talk about heart health all the time,” Johnson said in an interview with BYU-Idaho Radio, “we can talk about brain health too without judgment and without sort of the stigma attached to, you know, ‘Oh, you're having a crisis.’ Well, it's just brain health. I need to take care of my brain today. What am I doing to make that happen?”
She encouraged listeners to share their stories with trusted people and professionals. She said studies show when people share their stories it increases empathy and reduces shame.
Her final step toward help and healing is to trust the Lord.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart,” she said in the interview. “Because in the process of this, He will place people, impressions, opportunities—all of these things in your life to guide you toward healing one step at a time.”
Toxic Perfectionism
Johnson says perfectionism is all about “never being—or doing—enough… the belief that you’re always falling short.” She called it a burden, rather than a virtue.
She taught students that it’s through accepting the Savior’s gift of the atonement, accepting His grace, that they can overcome toxic perfectionism.
Ability to Feel the Spirit
In her devotional address, she said when she was in her depression, she struggled to feel the Spirit. She continued to pray, read her scriptures, go to church and attend the temple, but she says she didn’t feel the Spirit like she did before the depression.
She learned from Sue Clark, former first lady of BYU-Idaho, that the Spirit does come back.
“Depression thrives in secrecy and shrinks in empathy, as do all mental health conditions,” Johnson said. “So don’t be afraid to reach out for help. It’s the first step. It’s the scariest step, but it’ll be the most important thing you will ever do.”
BYU-Idaho has several mental health resources on campus and online. To explore options, go to the Counseling Center website. If you or someone you know is in a mental health crisis, call the National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988.
The full transcript and video of Sister Johnson’s talk will become available on the BYU-Idaho Devotionals and Speeches website in the coming days.